ASBOs to be discontinued

Funny story written by Lady Godiva

Friday, 20 August 2010

image for ASBOs to be discontinued
A Typical ASBO offence

At long last ASBO effectiveness has been questioned. Findings from studies indicate that a high percentage of individuals having 'ASBOs slapped on them', have been found to be suffering from mental illnesses, learning difficulties and many were found to be 'scapegoats' in neighbourhood disputes.

As well as studies carried out by Government Agencies, when casually interviewed on the streets of housing estates which house large numbers of ASBO recipients - it was discovered that there are competitions being run amongst ASBO recipients as to who can 'get the most in a week' and 'who get get one for the most idiotic offence'.

One young man told our reporter that he got one for walking around wearing odd socks. Another young man said he'd received an ASBO for picking his nose in front of a policeman and yet another told our reporter he had received ASBOs for, coughing in public, not wearing a Boro scarf to a Boro match and one for crunching his boiled sweets instead of sucking them when he 'went to the pictures'.

ASBO's must go! They are a waste of time and public money.

The Media treats ASBOs as comedy fodder:

In Little Britain - Vicky Pollard introduced the adjective "ASBOtastic".

In the t.v. show "Skins" during episode 1 of season 2, Maxie's dad refers to the kids outisde their apartment as "The ASBO Army"

"ASBOjuice" is the term for alcoholic drinks when drunk by underage kids.

In Season 1, episode 2 of the new British t.v. series 'Sherlock' the character of Dr. Watson says the police intend to issue him with an ASBO in relation to vandalism.

One thing is obvious ' ASBOs AFTAGO'.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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