Written by Bertram Chapley

Thursday, 14 April 2005

image for PM Name Change Horror
Tony Brown a.k.a. ?

It has today emerged that Prime Minister Tony Brown has applied to Somerset House to have his name changed by Deed Poll. This shock disclosure will ensure that the 2005 General Election is going to be one of the most memorable on record.

This revelation was leaked to our Press Office from an insider in Somerset House who has confirmed that an Anthony James Cedric Brown of 10 Downing Street Westminster has applied to change his name to Manny Festow a move which will add confusion to an already confused electorate.

This shock has appeared only days after Lib Dem leader has announced he is naming his first born Benjamin Disraeli and Tory leader Michael Howard says he likes to be called Gloria at the week-ends.

BBC political correspondent Andrew Marrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr suspects that the move is to further distance the PM from the Chancellor Gordon Brown (no relation). It is also possible he has jumped in first as close advisors to the Chancellor had suggested Gordon change his name to Blair, the maiden name of the PM before he married Cherie Brown.

"All the main political parties have their own manifesto, now New Labour have two.
The name changing tactic worked a treat in the 1997 campaign when New Labour changed their name from The British Socialist Left Wing No Hopers" said Andrew from his downstairs bathroom.

"It may be that he got the idea from his brother the US President Holly Bush who until the Election last year was called Adolf, the US public were well and truly duped and he got in again. As the November election was leading up to Christmas it was thought he was relying on the feel good factor and choosing Santa Clause as his running mate to me confirmed this"

New Labour spokesman John Hoomey has said that the claim is just pure speculation.
"Mann……. er I mean Tony will be making a statement later from his Camp David retreat but I can categorically say there are no plans to redesignate the PM. This is a Tory party tactic. Remember Windscale ?"

In a separate move the Torys are saying they will peg the FTSE index at 10,000 and balls to what the city think.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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