Written by Hefton Plates

Monday, 30 June 2003

Shock has spread throughout the political landscape tonight after the news that Tony Blair has sacked Home Secretary David Blunkett for "not knowing what people look like".

"I mean, come on, it's obvious, isn't it?" continued the Prime Minister at a press conference today. "Mr Blunkett doesn't even know what stuff looks like, so how can he be a judge of what to do with them? He's got a home, but does he even know what colour it is? Or even what colours are?".

David Blunkett was said to give his reaction to the Prime Minister's decision but was unable to see the speech he was set to be giving. Blair meanwhile maintains that he hopes to "remain good friends" with the ex-Education Minister.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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