The current 'five a day' message of eating fruit and veg is to be abolished.
Government advisor Dr Moe Green has published a controversial report calling for a revised set of 'Five a Day' guidelines.
He says: "Enough of having fruit and veg rammed down our throats. We're not any healthier or any happier. To hell with the experts. Let's be happy now. We could be dead tomorrow."
Dr Moe recommends:
Nutritionists however were outraged at the suggestions.
Food expert Olive Malcolm stormed: "This man is out of his mind. Sex, drink and laughter do NOT make people happy. What makes people happy is a high fibre diet based on grains, boiled foods and coleslaw."
That view was backed up by Doktor Gillian McKeith. The TV dietician added: "I always eat sensibly. And you can see by my face can see that I'm certainly not miserable. I never crave crinkle cut chips, ice cream, steak, onion rings or macaroni cheese. I prefer boiled fish and it's not just because of my back."
Despite the controversy, the Govt is expected to endorse Dr Moe's findings later this year, but denied it was sniffing round for votes.
