Blair 'Wont Stand Up Yet'

Funny story written by Anne Greaves

Tuesday, 25 May 2004

image for Blair 'Wont Stand Up Yet'
Weary: Blair This Weekend

Tony Blair will not bow down to pressure by standing up before he is ready, says David Blunkett.

Following recent rumours that the PM will stand down before the next General Election, he has taken a firm seat in his armchair, and is reputed to be conducting affairs of national and international importance from his new position.

Downing Street insiders say Mr Blair took to the chair around 9:00am yesterday, letting out a huge sigh, and asking for a cup of tea.

He has since taken all telephone calls and meals at his seat, and there is speculation that the next Commons debate will take place in his sitting room.

Home Secretary David Blunkett told TheSpoof "Tony will not give in to pressure by standing up before he is ready. He is an excellent world statesman and party leader, and if he needs a rest, he is entitled to one".

"I'm sure he will stand up before the next election, but in the meantime we need the press to stop hounding him so he can relax".

Channel 4 are said to be negotiating access to Number 10 in order to film 'The Real Big Brother'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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