Following the Department of Environment's call for a mass culling of Badgers after a damning report claimed badgers are solely responsible for TB in cattle a spokesbadger for the normally shy nocturnal mammals has slammed UK Government officials:
Mr Badger (of Wind in the Willow fame)sensationally fired back at Sir David King's claim that the timid creatures are wholly responsible for the Bovine epidemic:
"What would David King know, he's being hanging around our sets night after night with infra-red cameras, spying on our every move like some sleazy voyeuristic weirdo, just because we wouldn't go along with his ideas for a new documentary he want's us all dead, We carry one disease, these scientists carry hundreds, so why shouldn't they be selectively culled?"
"Between him and those idiots from the National Geographic, it has become impossible for a badger to even make out in private without some whispering perv judging your performance in the distance… how would you like it?"
The interview then turned nasty when a government veterinary expert then challenged him to explain the proven statistics showing the increasing relationship between Badger and Bovine TB. Badger reacted furiously to the claims almost foaming at the mouth as he screamed "comments like that make me sick to my stomach".
He was later taken out back and destroyed as a precautionary measure
