Well-known wizard Gandalf the White was stopped at Morrisons Supermarket from buying two bottles of white wine because he allegedly looked under-age.
The incident happened at Morrisons in West Kirby, Wirral. The white-haired wizard told our reporter:
"After a hard day of bashing Orcs, conferring with my friends Elrond and Lady Galadriel, and liberating Middle Earth from Sauron's hordes, I like to settle in for the night with some Longbottom Leaf and a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon.
"I popped into Morrisons to buy some cheap plonk and was asked for something called a driver's licence or passport to prove my age. I said I didn't have these and was told that I needed to prove my age, even though I'm an Elder Wizard and am over 1,000 years old"
Gandalf - also known as Mithrandir - added:
"I tried a wizarding technique I learned from a friend. I waved my hand mysteriously and said 'You are over 18, you may pass'. But the check-out assistant replied 'What do you take me for, a Storm Trooper?'."
"I was angered by this, shook my wizard's staff and thundered 'I am a Keeper of the White Light. You will let me pass!', but the snivelling toady chuckled and said 'I'm not a Balrog either'. I realised that nothing I could do seemed to work and I left the shop in disgust without my wine."
The Manager of Morrisons said:
"All customers must prove their age, even if they are obviously over 18. We introduced this pointless rule to slow things down at the tills and annoy customers. Gandalf should have brought some form of identity with his age on it."
We interviewed Gandalf again, who said that he's so thoroughly fed up of Britain that he's thinking of emigrating to America.
"There's a tall ship leaving for the West tomorrow and I'll be on it."
