Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 13 June 2007

image for London building collapse ends Hazel Blears' political ambitions
The building's collapse is a surefire message from above

London - (Ass mess): The Westminster building which collapsed yesterday and which had housed Labour Party Chairwoman Hazel Blears's campaign office for her Deputy Prime Ministerial ambitions may be a blessing in disguise according to Whitehall sources.

"This is a sign from above that the game is up for Blears. No one's ever going to vote for her after such an ominous portent," said an eyewitness to the collapse which happened in Dean Farrer Street yesterday afternoon.

Another eyewitness told reporters that this was the second life-threatening major disaster he had been involved with and felt 'something or someone is stalking me!'

Dave Pratt, 49, said he had been walking past the Grand Hotel in Brighton in october 1984 when a massive explosion felled it to the ground and a chunk of masonry hit him on the head, necessitating several stitches and anti-depressants for the following two years.

"I thought all that was behind me when wham! Yesterday I was walking past Hazel Blears's office in dean Farrar Street when a huge exploding sound suddenlt tore through the building and a huge chunk of masonry came crashing down on my head, necessitating several stitches.

"I think this might be a message from above," Mr Pratt said as an ambulance took him to nearby Guy's Hospital where Hazel Belars was also being treated for shock and awe.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: hazel blears




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