Wiltshire - Olympic copyright protection authority jobsworths swooped on an Alton Barnes wheat field this morning amid reports of blatant cashing in on the Games logo.
An alien crop circle depicting the Olympic Rings had sprung up overnight 'in complete defiance of Games brand licensing' - just like yesterday's illicit bagel display at a Southwark baker's shop window.
Wiltshire farmer Russell Titmouse was left fuming as protection racket pen-pushers attempted to serve him with a 'cease and desist' order banning all Olympic-themed activity on his land.
"I told them to get stuffed, of course," Titmouse commented to QM-NewsCorpse reporters, "my lawyers will run their own rings around these morons' insinuations."
However officials insist that the 500ft field etching 'may be the work of alien vandals' who are already planning to disrupt the Games with a defiant UFO flypast of the London Olympic Stadium.
"Stands to reason, innit?" Darren Pencilneck, chief investigating officer of the Olympic Protection Racket Delivery Authority tweeted this afternoon.
"Everyone knows the Stadium was built with alien money and resembles the lower superstructure of a Games Mothership."
Danny Boyle is 69.
