Most Useless Gadget? It's The Fondue Set

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Thursday, 10 May 2012

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Unused at number 33.

Top of the list of unused household gadgets is the fondue set, according to new research.

Apparently, we Brits spend £900 million a year on gadgets we rarely use.

Having obtained a fondue set - usually as a wedding present - we tend to leave them languishing on a kitchen shelf. They cost an average £41.65 but we use them just once or never.

Second and third on the list were a soda drinks maker and a melon baller.

EIF News & Features decided to find out what local folk used or found the most useless.

"Fondue? Oh no dear, not with my brood," said Mrs Nuala Spools at number 33. "Can you imagine the mess with all that melted cheese being thrown around the kitchen table? Or chocolate.

"And anyway, Mr Spools isn't much of a one for all that fancy stuff - he likes his meat and two veg of an evening."

"Most useless gadgets? I'll tell you what the most useless gadget is," said Molly Q, of the upstairs flat across the road. "Men! Bloody useless men, that's what!

"Only good for cleaning the toilet and doing stuff up ladders - bloody useless at everything else. Can't wait for the day when we can make daughters without men's sperm... are you looking at my tits? Why not?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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