Car-parks to crack down on inflatable cars

Funny story written by IainB

Monday, 14 November 2011

image for Car-parks to crack down on inflatable cars
Fifty percent of the cars in car-parks are now inflatable.

The UK's big three Car-Park operators are banding together to make inflatable cars illegal.

"It's getting ridiculous," said N-CARP Chief of Operations, Carl Parkin. "At any one time in our town centre car-parks, about half of the spaces are occupied by the damn things."

The inventor of the inflatable car, David Williams, is unrepentant.

"The inflatable car is a boon to the modern motorist," he said. "Car-parking in town and city centres is at a premium, finding somewhere to park is hard."

Williams's inflatable car comes in three models, the Fiat, the Ford and the Audi.

"People have been buying each of the models to reserve themselves a car-parking space, which is the intention," said Williams. "Think of it as a sun lounger towel. The Audi is the top of the range inflatable car. It self inflates when it detects that the car above it has driven away, and deflates when it senses the owner's car approaching. The Ford is pretty good too, with it's remote control inflation and deflation. It's our most popular seller. The Fiat has to be let down manually and pumped up with any foot pump. We've sold a fair few of these to the cost conscious."

"I'm sure that the intention is good," said Parkin. "But we can't tow the bloody things, there's nothing to put a clamp on, and there's no point ticketing them, as we can't trace the owner."

Currently, N-CARP's solution is to pop the inflatable cars when they spot them.

"We've equipped our parking officials with sharp sticks," said Parkin. "A quick jab and the space is free again."

This has prompted Williams to develop the Kevlar coated Ferrari model.

"I expect it to sell well," said Williams. "I guess we're entering a bit of an arms race."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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