(Santa Cruz, California) - An out-of-shape 42-year-old man experienced a pulled muscle this week as he attempted to hurdle a parked car.
When asked why he tried to jump the vehicle in the first place, the victim, elementary school teacher George Mallory said: "because it was there".
The equal parts Philosophy & Sport of "parkour" (a term coined by David Belle and Hubert Koundé in 1998) consists of movement over/around environmental obstacles as fluidly and efficiently as possible. While normally associated with fit, young people below the age of 30, it has caught on in recent years and is being practiced more frequently by white-collar males struggling in vain to regain their youth.
An anonymous nurse at a local emergency clinic commented, "I hate the 4 p.m. to midnight shift, because that's when most of the parkour fellas show up. We like to make them wait just a little longer than everyone else before we tend to them."
"I like to say that at one time in our history, natural selection would have ensured these idiots were eaten by a hungry dinosaur sooner than the rest (of the village)."