Henman's shocking outburst live on air has left many stunned, with Mrs Agnes McSpartanite of the Forth of Firth and Fifth left deeply stunned. She said on local thistle radio this morning "I'm stunned"
When we tried to track Henman down this morning, he was not at home. Milk was still on the doorstep, and according to neighbour Bob Lacket Henman may have fled the country. Bob told us "At 4 o clock this morning I heard a taxi pull up at Tim's and someone resembling Tim ran out of Tim's house. In fact I'm sure it was Tim". Bob went on to say that the taxi sped down the road like a rocket. The Sun newspaper naturally acted quickly, with headlines of "Henman Court Out" and "Tim aint fixed it", that latter headline causing legendary cigar chomping womanizer Sir Jimmy Saville to sue the newspaper.
Meanwhile up in Scotland, Andy Murray has arrived back from his unfortunate yet expected Wimbledon exit. There was no shortage of reporters on hand as Murray stepped out of his Ford Fiesta, updating him on Henmans comments. "This is War" Murray screeched as he threw his racket into the crowd and stormed off. He was last seen at the William Wallace memorial trying to dislodge the Claymore sword from the statue, akin to "Sword in the Stone" - Unconfirmed reports are coming in that Scotland has blockaded the roads from England.
Could this be Bannockburn all over again? Have Henman's comments really put the Crown under pressure? Will Haggis overtake curry as the national dish? Keep watching for regular updates on sky / BBC world and Asian babes....