Chelsea 'Better' Than Southend - Scolari

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Wednesday, 14 January 2009

image for Chelsea 'Better' Than Southend - Scolari
Terry With The Penalty...Oh No He's Slipped And Lost His Footing At The Crucial Moment!!

Big Phil Scolari announced in a press conference today that Chelsea were a better team than Southend.

Which should come as no surprise to seasoned football fans the world over, considering that the current squad of Chelsea players cost something in the region of a billion pounds, and that Michael Ballack's monthly paycheck could fund Southend for a year or more.

Yet Big Phil, still reeling from the pasting that his team took at Old Trafford on Sunday, when they looked like a pretty crap pub team as they succumbed 3-0 to a rampant Manchester United side, seemed strangely insecure.

"If we play with the same heart they do," he said. "Then we can win."

The Spoof says:

"Come on Big Phil, stop with the excuses. You're playing Southend, not Barcelona. Or Manchester United." (Heh heh)

More as we get it

Chelski won but personally this reporter is far from convinced.

Or should that read 'convicted'?

I dunno.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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