Tuesday, 26 June 2007

GEOFFREY Boycott, the Yorkshire and England opening batsmen and cricket commentator is recovering in hospital after his ire came close to exploding during the recent test series between England and West Indies.

Yorkshire-born Boycott was reported to have become unstable after up after a particularly bad mis-field by West Indian bowler Darren Powell during the final rain affected match at Chester Le Street near Yorkshire.

A joint statement from Channel Five and BBC Testmatch Special reads: "Geoffrey was doing what he loved doing best - lamenting the absolutely appalling quality of cricket on the current West Indies tour - when his anger started to spiral out of control and he began to inflate.

"When Powell failed to stop a ball simply rolled at him by Paul Collingwood it was too much, there was a small crumphing sound and a great whoosh of Yorkshire air, as if of escaping wind from a deflated Yorkshire pudding, then all was quiet."

No-one was hurt in the incident and quick thinking by co-commentator Vic Marks, who removed the White Rose County man's enormous Panama hat allowing much of the power of Boycott's apoplexy to diffuse across the rolling northern countryside.

West Indies coach David Moore said: "We're sorry. Geoff was, as always, right, we're playing like latrines."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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