MENTALLY troubled Premiership ace Frank 'Lamps' Lampard has quit Barcelona just days after revealing he couldn't play alongside himself at Chelsea any more.
Lampard set off for the Camp Nou hoping that the absence of himself from the line-up at the Catalan giants would allow him the freedom to play his true game.
But sources in Barcelona claim the England midfielder ran into himself at the very first training session and he's shown himself the door as a result.
"He doesn't know what to do," a pal said. "It seems there's no escape for Frank, wherever he goes there he is."
Lampard is reported to be furious with Barcalona Coach Frank Rijkard, who had promised him a Lampard-free midfield in which to express himself.
The availablity of parts of one of England's most effective footballers has sparked a tiny auction among some of the country's smallest club, who believe they can uniquely offer the troubled Londoner space away from himself.
Hereford United, Boston United, The Mint Imperials (A Unibond Minty League Team), and the Huntley Rec Footspompers have already come in with infinitssimable bids, with Hereford leading the way with an offer of £25,000 for a third of Frank's 'big game nous'.
Pshychologists fear that the Lampard case could be the first of many and are closely monitoring the numbers of pro's spotted talking about themselves in the third person -believed to be the first sign of a Lampard style self split.
"I think the fact that he has exactly the same name as his dad is a problem," said Doctor Offalicous Tendent.
"Being Frank Lampard Junior was bound to open up all sorts of questions of identity for a young and sensitive midfield dynamo," he added.
Indeed Lampard is said to have become so infuriated with himself that he has come close to blows in training-ground bust ups this season.
"I heard him," said a Chelsea source. "He said Lamp Frank hard Frank Lampard, and then he landed one on his own chin! Phew, what a nutter."
