Kevin Garnett Throws Boston Media into Golden Pond

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Thursday, 19 April 2012

Boston Celtics star Kevin Garnett won (for the second time) the Red Auerbach Award on Wednesday night for the 2011-12 season.

He deserved it.

Later, in the locker room he ripped the Boston media to shreds.

KG tends to hold a grudge longer than a Mafia don. He measured media opinion shapers for cement overshoes.

He called out the media for their snide comments, calling the team old, washed up, and they should be broken up for months.

Garnett offered the best analysis in telling the assembled media shills that they know nothing about team chemistry or what players think. He gave the media a lesson in team chemistry.

Since the broken down, out of shape media members couldn't play any professional sport, the gap between the Boston shills who trump up a controversy every week in pro sports and the players was revealed.

Garnett pulled back the curtain to reveal the small men with microphones and notepads.

The radio blabbers and TV sound biters were rapt, chuckling over the gold video that KG provided yet again.

Kevin Garnett is highly competitive and slam-dunked the media. If you want to know what players think of the sycophantic bloodsuckers of the media, this was the moment.


KG looks down on the fools who make their living off the sports stars. Ticks, tapeworms, and head lice receive better treatment than Garnett gives his pals in the media.


After 17 seasons, Garnett no longer feels any reason to withhold his feelings. His channeling of Ponce de Leon this year shows he may be coming to the end. He wants to go out holding back nothing.


The Big Ticket punched the tickets of the horde of media barbarians.


If you don't love KG, you must be a loser.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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