Devil Rejects Ted Kennedy's Soul
HADES, HL - Lucifer held a press conference Tuesday afternoon to announce his decision regarding Ted Kennedy's application for residence.
written by Moose, 21 September 2010
TEAT Party Activists Announce Whack-A-Thon
Barney Frank, Chairman of the newly formed TEAT-Party announced today that his organization is planning a 24-hour circle-jerk to protest the success of the TEA Party movement.
written by Moose, 21 September 2010
Hilary Clinton attempts to abolish cooking smoke, but not from her 5* restaurants!
Mrs.Clinton loves eating at fancy restaurants and doesn't mind the smoke in the kitchen, but the global poor should be banned from causing cooking smoke, it's bad for the environment, that SUCKS!
written by unknown
The Vatican loves its "bent Priests" and "bent Bankers"!
The Pope not only has his "bent Priests" to deal with now it seems that his very own bank is full of "bent Bankers", God forgive them all (he will!).
written by unknown
Jimmy Carter Calls Bill Clinton a "Pussy"
Former President Jimmy Carter isn't letting the truth stand in the way of his assessment of his life. "I am superior to other presidents," Mr. Carter said in an interview with CNBC News.
written by Moose, 21 September 2010
Tesco to sell Viagra at their Pharmacy counters
CEO says "We're ready to up-size".
written by pinxit, 21 September 2010
Britain Gets Diarrhoea
San Francisco man and fake Royal blamed. Something to do with a blueberry based diet. Brits revert to fish and chips and pie and peas in protest.
written by Skoob1999, 21 September 2010
Assassination Survivers Club
This year's Assassination Survivors Club will be held in a secret location, members will be informed individually. We don't want a repeat of the Assassination Survivors Club Massacre last year.
written by IainB, 21 September 2010
Beiber: I can do things on my own... I just choose to destroy other people's songs.
Beiber took a step of independence today away from his usual bodyguards, as he went on his from his mum's house to the shop. "I'm a real independent guy. I walk my dog alone all the time."
written by masterchev, 21 September 2010
Controversial D.H. Lawrence Classic updated
Pandering to youth market, Penguin publish "Lady GaGa's Liver".
written by pinxit, 21 September 2010
Obama locks self out of White House. Michelle Mad.
Barack Obama's in a lot of trouble at the minute having left his keys INSIDE the White House. With an important conference imminent, Obama risks having to smash a window: for the first time in history
written by masterchev, 21 September 2010
Hacker Stole My Identity!
After going over my personal files, has contacted me begging to take it back.
written by Charpa93, 21 September 2010
Spelling Mistake in new Vatican Sex Education Book
A spelling mistake is found in new Vatican book on sex education. Instead of 'Carnal Knowledge' the book refers to 'Cardinal Knowledge'. A vatican source said it was a slip of the tongue.
written by Xavier, 21 September 2010
Pope's Putti Arrest
Pope Benedict was arrest at Airport for having a picture of a naked putti which breaks UK laws on images of children. The pope is being held in Highpoint Jail sharing a cell with George Michael.
written by Xavier, 21 September 2010
Democrats and Republicans are Moving
Both political parties close their offices in Washington DC. DNC Chair Kaine announced a move to Detroit MI, most liberal city. RNC Chair Steele announced a move to Provo UT, most conservative city.
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
NBER Says Recession Over
National Bureau of Economic Research indicates the recession officially ended in June 2009, which marked the beginning of an expansion. Tell that to the 9.6% of Americans who are still unemployed!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Anybody got a Two by Four
President Obama at the UN is to tell Iran that the door is still open to engagement. Secretary of State Clinton unsuccessfully tried to explain to the president that this will be his 52nd try!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Campaign Finance Speech
In his speech President Obama talked about special interests stealing the 2010 elections. Does that mean the Democrats are finally getting rid of their labor union and trial lawyer etal support?
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
President Obama is a Magician
The American public is watching Obama's right hand, while he performs a flim-flam act with his left hand. The DNC, HS Pelosi, SML Reid & shady Democratic organizations do the political chicanery!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Yet another Obama Election Year Jobs Bill
President Obama asks Democratic liberal left Congress for $500 billion to shift all US highways to driving on the left side of the road. Infrastructure jobs such as moving traffic lights & signs!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Program Management (PM) 101
A PM team makes a mess (Bush Adm.). Upper Management (USA voters) hires a new PM team (Obama Adm. & Congress). New PM team screws up badly. Upper Management (USA voters) hires another PM team!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Program Management (PM) 102
The new PM team (Obama Adm. & Congress) get a reasonable bitching period to learn about how the old PM team (Bush Adm.) screwed up. Then the new PM team must cease bitching & perform or be replaced!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Hands on Solution to a Problem
Christine O'Donnell (R) if elected Senator from Delaware says she will solve the horrendous masturbation problem that exists for teenagers, sperm banks and In vitro fertilization procedures.
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
How About That
New education study suggests that high school kids who cut sex education classes are doing it to have sex!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
Don't Tip this Valet (True)
A SF Restaurant Patron got into his car notices the passenger side seat was wet, floor mats had wet footprints & were littered with sunflower seeds. Rear seats were covered with sunflower seeds too!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 September 2010
