Shaq May Miss Rest Of NBA Season With Sprained Thumb
He might miss the playoffs if the same finger gets a hangnail.
written by unknown
Shaq May Miss Rest Of NBA Season With Sprained Thumb
He tried to be like the poor little Dutch boy who put his finger in the dyke, but this one slugged him.
written by unknown
Shaq May Miss Rest Of NBA Season With Sprained Thumb
Actually, he stuck it in Ivana Phuque, and now his thumb has Crabs.
written by unknown
Shaq May Miss Rest Of NBA Season With Sprained Thumb
Blames injury on Big Baby Davis, but who is the real baby here?
written by unknown
Shaq May Miss Rest Of NBA Season With Sprained Thumb
This rivals Deon Sanders' sprained little toe as lamest sport's excuse ever.
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Nipple Narratives?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Douche Discourses?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Diaphram Disciminations?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The I.U.D. Inuendos?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Dildo Diaries?
written by unknown
Obama Extends Wii Invitation to Republicans
In one last-ditch effort to extend a bipartisan hand to the Republicans on health care reform, President Obama invites Democrats and Republicans to the White House for a joint playing of Nintendo Wii.
written by Nik Voelz, 01 March 2010
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
Crotch Chatter?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Testicle Talks?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Asshole Arguements?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Titty Talks?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Cunt Conversations?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Dick Discussions?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Vagina Travelogues?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Penis Interventions?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
"I can't talk now, my mouth is full"?
written by unknown
Author stuck for sequel title to The Vagina Monologues
The Vagina Dialogues?
written by unknown
Spring News
with Victoria Pine.
Out by the mere this morning I saw goblin's toes and rotten spleenwort. The moles capered in the sun. Squire Baddely was already at work raping the village virgins. Spring is nigh!
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Bishop 'Denies Illegal Importing'
The Bishop of Westward Ho! denied illegally importing a coypu yesterday. 'I came home and found the creature nibbling the snowdrops', he claimed. 'I have no idea how it got there.' The case continues.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
South-East Set for Storms
Jolian Mooncalf, 54, of Hassocks in Sussex, has failed to set a new record for dancing with a cow. The Polka went well, but the belted galloway turned up her snout at the Gay Gordons.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Decorating Tips
An Ethiopian Wicker Sphere is one of the best coracles for night fishing in small reed-girt lakes or pools. 'I haven't found a better way to approach a slumbering pike', claims Phil Twytte of Ely Anglers.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Home Cooking
Jolian Mooncalf, 47, of Hassocks in Sussex, failed yesterday in a new record attempt. Mooncalf, 57, was trying to roast and eat his house. The house burnt down. 'Just like Sunday lunch!' he said.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
Several athletes on the teams were on the International Don't Fly lists, so never made it to Vancouver.
written by unknown
Woman in Kayak Record
June March, 24, the first woman to cross Mount Snowdon in a kayak, told reporters 'I did it for my Grandad Jarrow'. Jarrow March died in 1967 while attempting to cross the Sargasso Sea on a bicycle.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
The couple that the sent to the pairs figure skating was not married, so they couldn't touch each other.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
No one made it to the second round of "suicide bomber" tryouts.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
Sliding down a sand dune on a piece of cardboard is not good preparation for the slalom race.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
The Koran doesn't mention that snow and ice are cold.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
Too many were trying to barbeque goat on the Olympic flame.
written by unknown
Inventor Dies
Percy Flage, inventor of the wooden tea towel, died yesterday. Flage, who was 57, was also renowned as inventor of the aluminium ear guard favoured by Prince Charles, and the paper overcoat.
written by Erskin Quint, 01 March 2010
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
The camels didn't like wearing skis or snowboards.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
They don't make robes and burkhas out of lycra.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
Therre were no medals for running convenience stores or cheap motels.
written by unknown
Why the Middle Eastern Countries Were Shut Out of the Medal's Stand at the Winter Olympics
Athletes felt awkward because sheep were not allowed in Olympic Village.
written by unknown
Expansion Added To Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame #28
The R&R Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Leonard Cohen's Famous Blue Raincoat!
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expanded #27
The R&R Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Warren Zevon's Pina Colada from Trader Vic's
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Wayne Bridge at the "Bridge" avoids Terry's hand, it PONGED!
Wanye Bridge refused to shake hands with John Terry, he knew where it had been (down his partners knickers) and thought it might still PONG, well the whole affair certainly does!
written by unknown
The Iceberg Cometh
Two huge icebergs, Hillary #1 and #2 have broken off and are headed away from ice shelf.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Wonder Where Everone Went?
Reports say that Gilligan was the only one who was napping on the Minnow when Tsunami hit Sunday.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Didn't Know Tanks Were Gay
General in Afghanistan asks permission to use all gay tank crews.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (11)
An autographed copy of Elton John's autobiography entitled, Elton John - A Fairy Tail Story.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (12)
The 12 foot tall stuffed white rabbit that Jefferson Airplane used as one of their stage props during their concerts. (Thanks to Sir Spoofer Skoob for graciously loaning the rabbit to the museum.)
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (13)
The British maid's outfit that actress Dimples Puckingham wore on the 1970, 45 rpm sleeve cover of Led Zeppelin's Living Loving Maid.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (14)
A 45 rpm single from 1960, which listed Gladys Knight & The Pips by their original name, Gladys Knight & The Ho Hunters.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (15)
Two adult life-sized stuffed buffaloes, six stuffed chickens, and 37 stuffed Canadian mallards that were donated by Neil Young for the museum's All Things Neil Young Room.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame Expanded #26
The R&R Hall of Fame & Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like David Bowie's momento of Major Toms, a jar of Tang.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Building Enlarged # 25
The R&R Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Billy Paul's "Mrs. Jone's" Handkerchief.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked Three Legged Race cancelled when contestants start tying each other up bondage style.
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked National High School and Junior High School Cheerleading Championships declared pedophile heaven
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked co-ed relay race stopped when women reach for wrong batons.
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked leap frog game stopped in park when men seemed to not be able to jump over women, and ended up staying on top.
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked Monopoly games add pictures to the Community Chest cards.
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked farting contests changes former start phrase "Pull My Finger"
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked pool parties give new meaning to "The Breast Stroke."
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
Naked Texas Hold'em Poker gave a brand new meaning to "hole cards."
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
In named beach volleyball, the ball and the balls weren't the only things bouncing.
written by unknown
World Record Setting Largest Game Of Naked Twister Spawns Other Naked Contests
In retrospect, maybe Naked Lawn Darts wasn't such a good idea.
written by unknown
"I'm Doomed DOOMED!!!"
Cowell upset about tour as Subo won't come out of her room because of breaking a mirror after stumbling over black cat in front of her after trying to miss crack in sidewalk yesterday.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Russian winter Olympic team banned to Siberia!
President Medvedev has welcomed his winter "loser" Olympians home with a short-sharp trip to Siberia, they will be fed on reindeer blood and Siberian rat meat for 30 days, PERESTROJKA MY BUTT!
written by unknown
Fruit juices - great for healing
but only in specific circumstances - for example: if you find yourself in a plane that ditches in the Gulf of Mexico, your eyes will be able to pick out circling sharks.
written by Tcoah, 01 March 2010
Its A Living
My brother is now making a living selling furniture, unfortunately its his own.
written by p.doff, 01 March 2010
Thousand strip off in Sydney proving the point, aint we all f*****g UGLY!
Sydney, Australia, naked people have proven a well known ignored fact, the HUMAN RACE is pretty darn ugly when stirpped off! Especially Dad's with beer-guts, saggy boobs and orange-peel butts!
written by unknown
China to U.S. "Give us our stuff back"
And we don't want it "all played with and messed up", said Premier Ding Chaulingling
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Giant Iceberg Rams, Sinks, South Island-New Zealand!
Commonwealth countries declare war on ice. Not to be confused with "The Lion King on Ice" or "Soul on Ice" (E.Cleaver)
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Hollywood Starlets Agree: Spoof.com not real, mostly
Continually shaken by the headlines trundled across Spoof.com's website, the thinking challenged gals have decided to not take life (and the internet) so seriously.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Loan floated for floating casino
Cash strapped Indians were granted a line of credit for their 200' birch bark canoe moored in Miisssiiicaaaggguaay,Miss.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Vikings claim "Our ships are 'green' raiders!"
Vindhalle,Norway Using only sail, oars and oaths for propulsion, Norsemen argue that they should be allowed to continue raiding and pillaging based on the non-pollutive, organic aspects of their fleet.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
There are a lot more scientific waxes for the sled skids than lard from tu madre's cocina.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
It was the only sled in competition with La Virgen de Guadalupe painted on one side and The Sacred Heart on the other.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
In retrospect, maybe the chain steering wheel wasn't such a good idea.
written by unknown
Massive Head Pharoah Uncovered
Massive head of pharaoh sculpture unearthed in Egyptian archaeological dig. Experts believed he died from massive head.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
They made a mistake when they got to Canada: they drank the water.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
The lycra speed suits made to look like baggy chinos just didn't do it for the fashionistas.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
Three words: Lose the boombox. The stereo speakers were not aerodynamic and the judges didn't like Little Joe Y La Familia.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
Hanging fuzzy dice from the rearview mirror and putting a bobble head chihuahua in the rear window did not help with wind resistance.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
Having a low-rider sled bounce while going down the ice probably wasn't a good idea.
written by unknown
Lil Wayne's Cellmate
Lil Wayne set to test how jails handle celebs, especially cellmate, "Big Harry".
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
Next time, don't make the sled out of adobe.
written by unknown
The Tragic Failures of Mexico's Bobsled Teams Explained
"We thought putting a guy in the back who'd eated frijoles would propel us down the ice faster, but he just gassed out the other riders."
written by unknown
Jihad Against Jordan
CIA suicide bomber calls for jihad against Jordan. Michael: "What have I ever done to these people?"
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
"Guitar Hero" more like "Wasting time with a fake guitar loser"
Time to get out and look for a job!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Iceland gears up ice exports to make up deficit
"Its all we have left as a cash crop", moaned Lermman Nordeneroupessonn
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Irish Leprechaun Exiled to Leper Colony in Gross Mix-up
The poor little trickster is now trapped on an island in the middle of the Indian Ocean, for life!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #24
The R&R Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Bill Haley's Clock that he once rocked around.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #23
The R&R Hall of Fame & Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like a picture of Smokey Robinson's twins, "Baby, Baby".
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Giant Rogue Iceberg Mauls Trainer While New Zealand Watches in Horror!
Now this has gone waaaaay too far!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Icebergs, or should we call them iceberrrrrrrrgs?
They are definitely NOT a frozen confection!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Iceberg larger than two to three European countries!
This one is large!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Largest Iceberg seeking own Titanic for "thrill sinking!"
Seagoing ships should seek safety soon suckers!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Burgeoning Ice shelf begets biggest berg
The floating cake of ice is over twice the size of Africa!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
"Home on the Range" becomes apartment with gas stove for retired cattleman
Wilfred Brumley Slapsleather has decided to pack up the little dogies and call it a day as he rides into the sunset.
Will put horse in extra bedroom!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (06)
An extremely rare photo of Carlos Santana shown swimming across the Rio Grande into Texas as a young boy of 8. (Photo courtesy of The Border Patrol).
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (07)
A San Francisco concert poster that introduced Linda Ronstadt's back up band, the Eagles, who were known at the time as The Canaries.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (08)
A public service video for birth control showing the members of The Mamas and The Papas telling the viewers to avoid becoming mamas and papas by making sure to use condoms and to use them properly.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Happy February 29!!! OOOPS!!!!
That was last year's calendar!I shoulda looked before I leapt!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (09)
A photo of Crosby Stills Nash & Young taken in 1969, where Stephen Stills is asking a Pennsylvania state trooper how to get to Woodstock.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (10)
The only photo in existence of the Jackson Five, when they were known as The Five of Spades.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque Arrives Home After Vancouver Games
One local doctor recommends she gets plenty of bed rest... in his bed, of course.
written by unknown
Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque Arrives Home After Vancouver Games
Swedish Hockey Team thanks her for bringing them all into the Mile High Club on the trip back
written by unknown
Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque Arrives Home After Vancouver Games
Tells reporters "I'm so tired, I could sleep standing up" because she wasn't asleep when she was on her back!
written by unknown
Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque Arrives Home After Vancouver Games
Athlete asks reporters for a few days rest as "I'm all shagged out."
written by unknown
Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque Arrives Home After Vancouver Games
No rest for the athlete, as it seems everyone wants a piece of her
written by unknown
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (01)
An old 1978 concert poster of the band AC/DC showing the band's original name AC.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (02)
Madonna's first training bra, which her mother bought her when she was only six months old. (Training bra donated by Warren Beatty).
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (03)
The Dave Clark Five's very first album entitled, Introducing The Dave Clark Four.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (04)
A rare charcoal drawing of ZZ Top guitarist Billy Gibbons without his fake hillbilly beard.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Cleveland's Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Museum - New Article (05)
An old photograph of Fleetwood Mac before Stevie Nicks started dressing like one of the Salem witches and when her singing voice was actually pretty. (Photo courtesy of Vice-President Joe Biden).
written by Abel Rodriguez, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame Expands #22
The R&R Hall of Fame & Museum has fascinating relics like Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like, Remains of Richard Harris Cake Left Out in The Rain!
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expanded #21
The R&R Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like Father McKenzie's Darned Socks.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expansion #20
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Otis Redding's Dock from S.F. Bay.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expansion #19
The R&R Hall of Fame & Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like NO RESPECT sign from fat Aretha Franklin's bedroom.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Expansion #18
The R&R Hall of Fame & Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like the Coaster's Charlie Brown in Clown outfit.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expansion #17
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Wilson Pickett's Old Mustang, Sally.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Expansion At Rock & Roll Museum #16
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Cher's original ass.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Expansion To Rock & Roll Museum #15
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame & Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like Simon & Garfunkle's Garfunkle.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #14
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like tree with Sonny Bono's Face Imprint.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #13
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Buddy Holly's Unopened parachute.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expansion #12
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like the remains of Everly Bros Bird Dog.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock Museum Expands #11
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Fats Domino's ten broken piano stools.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expansion #10
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like the Clovers & Searcher's Love Potion #8.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Expansion #9
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Dylan's Rainy Day Women #12 & 35.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll's Expansion #8
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like Elvis Presley's Shot-Up TVs.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #7
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts like Chuck Berry's Walking Duck.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #6
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like David Crosby's multi-colored commode.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock Museum Expands #5
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Mick Jagger's Miracle Ear!
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock Museum Expands #4
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like adult diapers thrown at Tom Jones Show.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rock & Roll Museum Expands #3
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. It'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like 19 nipple rings found on stages.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
New R&R Expansion #2
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Osbourne's headless bat.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Expansion At R&R Hall Of Fame
The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland has fascinating relics like M. Jackson's "Thriller" mask. Soon it'll have space to showcase less flashy artifacts, like Elvis banana sandwiches.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
How About Dr. Moreau?
Stroke study finds neck stints safe, effective! Admit that Dr. Frankenstein may have been a head of his time.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Year Of The Tiger?
Chinese admit that it was probably LAST year that was "Year of the Tiger", but we'll see. Could come back and win all four big PGA tournaments.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
CIA Really Getting Sneaky
Afghanistan protects newly rediscovered rare bird turns out to be disguised unmanned drone rocket.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Atom Smasher Restarts
Atom smasher restarts to prepare for new science, world population reduction.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
WTO confirms that Meccano Sets more reliable than Toyota cars
"Standard hole spacing of ½", or 12.7 mm" better technology than that offered by Toyota
written by Tcoah, 01 March 2010
Buffett: Economy Recovering
Buffett says economy recovering but at slow rate. Should be on our feet again by 2050.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Obama Health Mostly OK
Obama yet to kick smoking habit, should eat better, get his mind off health care for at least one hour daily, say docs.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Presidential Helicopter Fleet to be revamped
in response to pilots complaining of stale-tobacco smells
written by Tcoah, 01 March 2010
Up Or Down Movement Voted Today?
White House: Simple up-or-down vote on health care, sex aids.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Same Old Greeting
Hillary Clinton to meet with Uruguay's incoming president under gun fire again as they run from plane landing in her latest report.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
President Obama Busy
Obama focuses on school dropouts, health care. Also on drug gangs taking over government property, health care. Mother-In-Law having arthritis attack, health care.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Medvedev Goes To France, French Surrender
Energy, culture, vodka, wine, beer on tap for Medvedev trip to France.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Euphoric End!
An euphoric end to a bittersweet Olympics as everybody drunk as skunks.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Skier Air Bags
Europeans introduce avalanche air bags in Utah. Also, they open up upon impact when a skier hits a tree...a little late.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
New Samakutra?
Spencer Tunick, who is known for his nude group photos in public spaces, posed 5,000 nude participants in Australia for more than an hour in a variety of positions.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Another Snow Attack
Nearly 200K without power after fifth big Northeast storm. "I hope Al Gore is under here", states resident as he digs out car for fifth time.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Gov. Takeover Worked So Well In Other Countries?
Senate impasse puts federal employees out of work. Senate action puts the rest of us out of work.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Warnings Meant For Good
Some scientists defend tsunami warnings! "Blamed if we do and blamed if we don't", says scientist. "So this time it turned out to be a three inch one, does that make everyone sad?"
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Acohol Over Marijuana
Marijuana Use Can Up Psychosis Risk, say experts. Where alcohol employs thousands, marijuana only hundreds & those illegally.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Marijuana Worse Than Alcohol?
Marijuana Use Can Up Psychosis Risk, say experts. While alcohol only causes liver damage, illusions and highway accidents.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Toyota will be safe again
Toyota said, it's problems will be corrected once they get a Kamikaze out of it's product design department.
written by disciple, 01 March 2010
Health tip for middle agers: Go easy on the gaseous hippie food!
You aren't 20 anymore and one too many fried falafels might do your lower G.I. tract an grave injustice! Oh,and your tie dyed shorts look stupid!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Huge Antarctic Glacier Calves Iceberg, Can't Keep Up With Herd
The little guy's legs are kind of spindly.Its going to be awhile before he can stand up and nurse for the first time.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Iceland sends huge iceberg to block Thames river mouth
"Ha Ha, This is payback for all those dirty financial deeds you laid on us!" said Gyrmin Bossdottir,Head of Economic Affairs. Iceland is teetering on brokeness as result of investments gone bad.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
This a big shout out to ma friends and bruthers behine da briks
Yo,Whaf wif all the hatin' gon' on 'bout the probs and distrukshun hapnin wif ma homies be on the lok down and
ain't no liftin' and wokin' out in da joint no mo?
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Greece calls on "Zorba" as last hope for economy
The most famous Greek in the last three millenia has been asked to lend a hand in restoring his mother country's finances.Only a strapping, charismatic hero can help now.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Greece Broke! Country must sell pieces of Parthenon as souvenirs
Our little Mediterranean neighbor is wishing they had stayed with the fishing and olive oil instead of joining the EU.Now they've resorted to "parting out" the country to earn some hard cash.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #11
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered while an aspirin will help keep a plant from wilting 7 days, a Levitra pill will cause it to stand erect for 7 Months.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Set Record For Nudity, Accidental Bump Ins
5,000 Australians show up to bare all for photo shoot. That's using the old noodle.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Newest Jacobite rebellion fizzles in Glasgow pub
Although it sounded like a promising idea starting around noon Saturday, another go at England lost most of its steam by about 8:30p.m. in the evening when "Britain's Got Talent" aired.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #10
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered that the French have over 75 words for "surrender".
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Rolling stones make offer on "Stone of Scone"
The British rockers are so wealthy that they have bought almost anything else their imaginations came up with."We just thought The Rolling Stones really should 'ave it, just fits," Mick said.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Terrorist Blows It!
Terrorist who accidentally blows up his whole group on a trial run, to receive 72 Richard Simmons on a desert Island.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
True Fact: Stone of Scone actually made from scones!
Scientists making one of 811 tests on the "Stone of Destiny" today found a detail missed for over 12 centuries.The "stone" is actually made of a simple water,butter,and shortening mix.Delicious!
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Canadian Hockey team signed by USA
The Canadian Hockey team, who tonight won the Gold in the Winter Olympics, have signed up with L.A.Kings. The fee? Free tickets to all AGT tapings and a contract to appear in next season's Survivor.
written by unknown
T.V.'s "I.T. Crowd" in popularity race with Best Buy's "Geek Squad"
The two groups have decided to have a computer hard drive registry re-allocation contest to decide once and for all who is the world's top techie.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
"Kinks" decidedly not kinky says Ray Davies
Tired of all the innuendos and double entendres about his rock group,leader Davies said yet again that it just had to do with his little sisters hair,which was very difficult to comb.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Firemen Rescue Larry King Again
Ex-wives leave Larry King hanging by his suspenders on a flag pole once again. Fire department to pass on charges to CNN as usual.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #9
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered why old people still flock to Florida even though no Fountain of Youth was ever discovered there in the first place.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Pixies,Leprechauns in rollicking beer brawl
What started as simple name calling quickly turned violent as large groups of fighting little people snarled traffic near Hyde Park Sunday. Bobbies with short batons waded into the melee to no avail.
written by Wumf, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #8
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered that there simply IS no way to make a purple M&M without it causing your fillings to fall out.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #7
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered why Clay Aiken suddenly asked all his friends to call him "Debbie" and moved to Dallas!
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #6
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered exactly how many angels can dance on the frozen head of Ted Williams.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #5
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered exactly where someone has to go to have an operation in order to speak like a wrestler.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #4
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered what does Donald Trump feed that thing on his head and what IS it, anyway!
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #3
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered why Kirstie Alley had suddenly starting calling herself, "Phillip D. Alley".
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough #2
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered why half of all NFL kickoffs end up with the receiving team being penalized for an illegal push or block in the back.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
Scientific Breakthrough
One of the great mysteries of science was solved today when scientists discovered why those bargain Rolex watches bought on the street suddenly begin to move counter-clockwise.
written by Bureau, 01 March 2010
