Time traveller in Chaplin's film reveals time travel conspiracy

Funny story written by IainB

Saturday, 30 October 2010

image for Time traveller in Chaplin's film reveals time travel conspiracy

It has come to light that the time traveller spotted in the Charlie Chaplin film of 1928 is the genuine article, and on top of this, a lot of the rebuttals against this being the genuine article are from Time Travellers themselves. A rogue time traveller has come forward, or rather backward, with the tell all.

As fast as the news appeared on the internet about the time traveller seen walking across the set in the Chaplin movie talking into a mobile phone, the rebuttals followed.

According to Tempore Fugit, the rogue Time Traveller, most of these rebuttals come from the Time Travel clean-up squad, whose job it is, is to clean up mistakes by time travellers to prevent paradox.

The device that the woman is talking into is a temporal communicator. According to Fugit, Agent Anna Domini realised she had walked onto the set of The Circus one of the early movies, and was calling back to get damage limitation sorted. Ironically, had she not done that, she wouldn't have needed to.

"What will have happened," Fugit said, "is that the clean up squad will have scoured the time lines for when this information surfaces and deployed a few agents around the globe to clean up. Ordinarily they would have destroyed the film, or something like that, but the film was too important historically, and the film maker who found them, George Clarke has a large impact on this time line to be quietly removed from it."

One of the clean up agents has posted that the device is a hearing aid made by Siemans. This is the current best theory as to what the woman in the film is doing.

"One of the clean up agents will have come up with this idea," Fugit explained, "and then popped back to 1924 to hand over the blue prints to what would have been the world's smallest hearing aid a the time."

According to Fugit, prior to Sieman's suddenly miraculous invention, hearing aids were either huge devices in themselves, or required thick wires to the batteries.

"The batteries themselves were massive," said Fugit. "If this was a Sieman's hearing aid with or without future help, she'd have been towing a trolley with the batteries on. The agent who set this up is hoping modern people have forgotten how bad batteries used to be. The clean up squad are very good. I've no doubt that this interview will end up on some satirical news page instead of the BBC."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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