London - (Slippery Stuff): Is it a new twist on Madonna's Material Gel?
Scientists at the UK's National Poisons Unit have come up with a 'Smart Gel' transparent goo that cuts down to size pesky infected sperm without decimating a guy's manhood.
It's carried in miniscule subcutaneous implants injected into the vaginal wall that are activated 'via friction'.
The nanoplants burst tiny droplets of the anti-HIV drug tenofovir - a microbicidal with a built-in homing device that detects penis activity on penetration.
Trial runs in a dozen countries found the 'smart gel' easily differentiates between the presence of penis and foreign objects like, say, a tampon or vibrator or inflatable toy.
Critics are warning however that the gel does not act like a traditional spermicide because it only impairs motility of male-creating sperm, not female.
"This stuff is so smart it kills off HIV and immobilizes the baby boy-creating spermatozoa that are behind all kindsa terrible problems," Professor Einstein Flintstone, head of Immunonology at the Royal Freak Hospital said today.
Madonna Kebab is 69.
