Written by Tcoah

Tuesday, 13 October 2009

image for Child Born with Hat Stand IQ Stuns Ivy League Profs
Porridge for the prodigal son

Child born with the IQ of a Hat Stand immediately works out the quickest route for navigating a bowl of spaghetti.

This remarkable achievement took place on the child's first day of life.

By the second day the child solved the "Salesmanship" problem - a mathematical solution for finding the quickest route between n random locations. 30% of salesmen immediately loose their jobs.

By the third day the child had solved the 'Holy Grail'; specifically, the protein folding problem putting thousands of crystallographers and supercomputer specialists out of work. The child worked out the 3D structure of proteins based on their primary structure (the sequence of their constituent amino-acids).

On the fourth day the child calculated the minimum number and sequential order of nuke launches to simultaneously destroy the Russian nuke stock pile, the Chinese stockpile, and eradicate the Iranian nuclear threat thus negating the need to reach an agreement with the Russians on the latest round of nuclear disarmament talks. Some two thousand people at the U.S. State Department and Pentagon lost their jobs, and some 300 heavy bombers permanently moth-balled.

On the fifth day the child worked out how to transfer the kinetic energy of our orbiting Moon to power domestic appliances around the home putting some 10 million power workers around the world out of work.

On the sixth day the child solved the Unified Theory of Everything - a problem worked on, but not solved by, Einstein.

On the seventh day, Einstein came to the child in the middle of the night and rung his neck.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: intelligence, IQ

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