Written by Fife Peterson

Monday, 15 January 2007

image for Cloudy Apple Juice Riddle Solved
Blackcurrent drinkers to 'spoil' their stock in a shock return to apple drinking

Scientists in the UK have finally put to rest the riddle of how some apple juice has a 'cloudy' appearance. After many different tests which have used space-age technology & cutting edge methods, Scientists have finally been able to remove the 'cloud matter' from juice, making the liquid clear. Tests have taken place over the last few weeks & officials are pleased to announce it is in fact apple or 'pulp from apple skins'.

Cloudy apple juice theories in the past have been as wide & varied as angry spirit gods, the curse of an ancient pirate Bob eyed Pete & actual cloud matter that apple trees absorb through their bark & transfer to the apples during the apples first 3-4 weeks of growth.

Asda, Sainsbury's & Tesco have all announced that they are keen to stock clear apple juice drinks now & Chelsea FC are in talks with Granny Smith for a new sponsorship deal.

Apples are part of your 5 a day the human body needs to stay healthy & in good shape. Beer is not, but scientists now believe drinking 15 pints of apple based Cider drinks can lower blood pressure, rejuvenate hair growth & cure aids.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
61 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more