Dear Rocko - My Neighbor's Annoying

Funny story written by Rocko the Zen Wallaby

Friday, 18 May 2012

Dear Rocko,

Just call me Sabrina, from Saffron City, Kanto. I have a neighbor who annoys me by leaving pamphlets and Chick tracts at my doors and windows. This neighbor just moved from Westboro, and I don't know if I let my Alakazam use a Pokemon move on that guy because doing it violates my beliefs. I already reported this to the police station, but this still keeps on going. I need advice. Blessed be!

Good day, Sabrina.

Your neighbor might be a fundamentalist, and leaving tracts on any eye-catching places except the trash can is part of their religion. Some of them have lack of respect, so I suggest that you want to move to another place.

Remember that there is no "true" religion, even there are random testimonies floating on the infinite Internet that involve kids having a day's trip to the astral plane with their deity/deities, so don't be afraid. It does not matter how people view The Source of all creation.

But if this neighbor takes drastic measures, you must defend your rights, without using the Ginsu knife and a bulldozer.

Also, I suggest that you might want to look for an article on the Internet that had instructions on how to stop other people from converting you.

Bright Blessings,


The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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