A Little Humor for the Mormon Readers

Funny story written by Jalapenoman

Friday, 16 October 2009

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You've got to be a Mormon if you call the choir "The Mo-Tabs"

Okay, please note that the writer is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (the Mormons). These are some personal observations about our little sub-culture and may not be understood by everyone.

They say that nothing lasts forever....unless you are listening to a High Council Speaker.

They say that nothing lasts forever....until you get called to work in the nursery.

They say that all good things must come to an end....which is why summer break and the last day of early morning Seminary are so beloved.

They say that time heals all wounds....but try telling that to a missionary with a "Dear John" letter.

They say that all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy...."they" have probably never been to the MTC.

If the Bishop's kids are always the worst kids in the ward, then who are the worst kids if the Bishop has no children?

If calling an older man to work in the High Priest Group is putting him out to pasture, then what would you call putting him in the nursery? Sending him to the glue factory.

Why does the church have a rule against painted faces and masks at Halloween parties. Haven't they seen the amount of make-up on some of the women every week in Relief Society?

I remember when my daughter went through the awkward age of being an eleven year old Merrie Miss in Primary. She snagged her nylons racing the other kids at the Easter Egg Hunt.

If you put your shoulder to the wheel and your nose to the grindstone and lengthen your stride all at once, won't you have to see a chiropractor and a doctor?

People in Utah call living outside of Utah "being in the mission field." Has anyone else ever noticed that there are missions in Utah?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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