Written by Pointer

Thursday, 26 February 2009

image for Feb 25 - Saint Sebastian Luis Aparicio: From Base Thief to Blessedness
Some say Luis' stolen bases were just the beginning of a career in high crime and grand theft auto

Saint Sebastian Luis Aparicio has the distinction of being the only saint to have been an all star shortstop in the Major Leagues. Luis as he was known in many years playing for the Chicago White Sox was famous for his cluthch hitting, his on base percentage, his golden glove and his incredible ability to steal bases.

In fact it was Aparicio's base thievery that almost prevented his canonization. In one of the most contentious sainthood trials, the Devil's Advocate appointed to reveal the candidate for sainthoods weaknesses denounced his inveterate habit of violating the seventh commandment. In his defense, St Dismas, the Good Thief, who was crucified at Jesus' right hand was cited as a significant precedent of a clepto admitted into the Kingdom of Heaven.

The clinching argument that allowed Aparicio's canonization was the evidence presented by the defense that the Church has granted sainthood to more mass murderers, torturers and philanderers than the Nazi Party. certainly, the defense argued, a little crook from Chicago could steal his way into heaven!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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