Written by K.C. Bell

Thursday, 11 December 2008

image for Governor Blagojevich Was Indiscreet, Maybe
"There is nothing like a buck."

Unless Governor Blagojevich of Illinois has a Swiss bank account or an account in the Grand Cayman Islands, proving the Governor took some bleeping money, Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald doesn't have much of a case against Blago except for using bad language over the telephone and maintaining a disastrous, Moe Howard, (Three Stooges) hairdo.

Guys over ten should not wear bangs. After ten, by Yul Brynner law, men should introduce the Patrick Buchcanan comb over. That goes for Tom Cruise and Bill Gates; even though Gates competes with God. Too bad the three executives from the auto industry didn't have Three Stooges hair styles. It could have been light years more entertaining. "Could you three comb-pool for your hair? Please? We'll give you the money."

Woman can wear bangs forever. Vogue's Anna Wintour always looks sleek, and Marlo Thomas still looks like, That Girl. Maybe Fitzgerald should investigate how Marlo Thomas manages to remain ageless, and Thomas might contemplate the possibility of negotiating the sale of youth stem-cells.

Joe Biden predicted Barack Obama would be tested by the enemy within the first six months of taking office. No one suspected it would be because of a bad hairdo, by a Governor using bleeping language, while negotiating the sale of Obama's Senate seat. The horror!

Spokesman David Axelrod said there were talks between Obama and Governor Bad Hairdo, but after Bad Hairdo was indited, Axelrod denied there were any talks??? Testing, testing: What do that mean?

Once Fitzgerald poetically suggested that sand was tossed into the umpire's eyes during the Scooter Liddy investigation, leaving Vice President Dick Cheney under a cloud. Maybe that sand had a very large rock that knocked the umpire in the head. Until Governor Bad Hairdo sends the Illinois National Guard to invade Canada or Indiana, killing over four thousand, incarcerating, interrogating and torturing men and women without trials, emasculating the Constitution, outing a C.I.A. agent, illegally wiretapping taxpayers, ignoring warnings from bin Laden, remaining pasted to his chair when told the enemy had struck the twin towers, Blagojevich isn't guilty of anything but bleeping language and a really bad hairdo.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Rod Blagojevich

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