1) Keep it in your garden to prevent the ingress of Jehovah's Witnesses, wandering minstrels, excommunicated heretics, Mormons and stray domestic fowls (this is not a suitable use of a wandering bishop, who will tend to stray from his post, though auxiliary and retired bishops will be content to stand in your garden).
2) Hollow it out and use it as a canoe (the shavings can function as bedding for many a fictitious sea-urchin family).
3) Train it to sing sea-shanties and cheer up a moping Uncle who was a sailor.
4) It could stand in the corner of a prominent room with a suitable lampshade and be a big lamp (you may have to shift the tallboy if it was there in the first place).
5) If you have geese, the bishop can often be happy with those, as their herdsman, though if you have grey-lag geese, they tend to be spooked by his hat so he may have to leave that in the house, unless you have enough sets of goose-blinkers to let them wear (of course, the problem with goose-blinkers is that the blinkered birds cannot see you when you approach, and this removes much of the pleasure of approaching a goose).
6) For children's parties, perhaps dress him as a clown, or, if you want to frighten the children, he can become a hump-backed giant Mr Punch, or mysterious pirhouetting harlequin (of course, you can leave him in his robes and get him to stand motionless in the guise of Tater-Du or any other lighthouse of your choice while the children pretend to be drowning 19th-century mariners).
7) Put him in the midst of a potato-patch as a holy scarecrow (being careful not to stretch his arms in a crucial posture).
8) He will be radiant in the centre of your best room as a conversation piece during a dinner-party or funeral breakfast.
9) Why not fill out cards with all the names of English places containing the word 'Bishop' (such as Bishops Cleeve, Cheriton Bishop, Bishops Umbrage, et al) within their names, and then get him to hold them and be a living signpost after the manner of the Isle of Man 'Signifier' School of Artists (if your family and friends are non-plussed by this arcane artistic reference or satire, you can simply amuse yourself with it, though be careful).
10) Sit next to your bishop, and read this list together, discussing with him (in latin, if you have it in your repertoire to thus engage with him) his favourite items; then, at the end, why not push him off his chair, crying 'Talk about a bishop being ex-cathedra!'
