Oprah To Follow Martha Stewart To Prison?

Funny story written by Bureau

Friday, 3 December 2010

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It's hard to believe that someone like Oprah Winfrey could spend any time in prison but the same was true for Martha Stewart and for the same crime.

Federal authorities are examining whether multiple insider-trading episodes on Wall Street have been going on for some time now.

"We received an insider report of someone who is guilty of helping information get out but would turn state's evidence in order to get a lesser sentence", stated Federal officer Allen Wainwright.

Wainwright referred us to John Sweetson who was closely involved with this case, also working for the Federal Government.

"We were surprised to find both Oprah and several other popular people on our list. Of course, we're sure that Oprah has handed all her investments over to a firm and it's the firm that is now in trouble."

Many of Martha Stewart fans argued the same thing. So did Willie Nelson years ago and Willie served no time because it was totally proven that Willie Nelson was an entertainer who knew absolutely nothing about whether his taxes had been paid or not. He was not involved in insider trading, but tax evasion.

"We're sure that Ms. Winfrey will co-operate with us and explain her position on her show", stated Sweetson.

A friend of Oprah told us that Oprah was totally amazed at finding out the information. She also quoted Winfrey as saying, "I'm going up the river?"

"Knowing Oprah, I am positive that she does not keep up with her empire. Who could?", asked the friend.

"Also, knowing Oprah, she might purposely agree to a month in prison just to see what it was like and to report the whole story back back to her fans."

Chester Ingraham for The West Coast Post

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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