Naked Woman, Who Looked Like Kristen Stewart, Goes Free

Written by Bureau

Friday, 29 January 2010


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Hot Buns Arrived Later

A woman who walked naked into a doughnut shop for a drunken bet, she claimed, escaped a jail sentence Friday.

Although she claims that it wasn't her, Kristen Stweart was identified by several witnesses as the nude gal that caused one of them to have to be given the Heimlich Maneuver.

Danny Fieldhouse stated that he had just taken a big bite out of his Long John with cream filling when the dark-headed nude walked in, or rather, staggered in.

"She ran right back out so I guess it was on a bet but I almost choked to death on that Long John...with the cream center."

Another customer gave Danny the squeeze of life and ran out just in time to see a nice rear end heading into a car that raced away.

However, the judge stated there was not enough evidence that Ms. Stewart was the perp and would not allow the men to see her nude to make sure this was the same lady.

"I was with Robert all day Friday", stated Stewart. "We went shopping."

"I still think I should get to see her naked bottom getting into a car", fumed the hero from the doughnut shop, Willie Biggers.

That was two hours before the real lady came forward and gave herself up to the police.

"It was just a stupid bet and we were all drunk", stated Fran Williams.

Let's hope she won enough to pay for her fine.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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