Mad Hatter Jim Carrey playing Scrooge in the Dicken's classic, A Christmas Carol has rocketed to Nr.1 in the US and made Charles Dickens turn in his grave.
Carrey, better known as an ACE, RIDDLER mending CABLES whilst wearing a strange MASK, LYING LYING playing BRUCE, GOD ALMIGHTY, getting DUMB and DUMBER has now turned his mercurial talents to being a SCROOGE and the Yanks love it!
Brits meanwhile, slightly reserved at the thought of their Christmas classic being turned into a Hollywood, clowning blockbuster for millions of bucks, are not quite so enthusiastic.
Stiff, and very upper-lipped Brit film critic, Quentin Hoggsbody of the Times quoted:
"This f*****g clown Carrey should stick to what he's doing best, producing non-funny, crap movies for mega-bucks and leave the Brit classics for decent actors!"
"Who?" asked a waiting crippled film fan called Tiny Tim.
Snobby Quentin replied "well let's think, comedian Jack Dee would make a classic Scrooge, he's a Brit and a very funny miserable old sod!"
Tiny Tim nodded in agreement, handed out his begging bowl and Quentin brushed him rudely aside, AAAAHHHH!
"Ask that bastard Carrey for a couple of bucks you cripple, he's got enough."
Tiny Tim got on he's knees and prayed to BRUCE GOD ALMIGHTY that an evil CABLEMAN would haunt the tight bastard for the rest of his miserable life!