Written by nigmuncher

Tuesday, 13 October 2009

image for Brian Blessed to play part of Frodo in new production of 'Lard of the Rings'
Jo Brand as 'Shelob'

Thespian and committed luvie, Brian Blessed, is set to play the part of Frodo the Hobbit in a new stage production of 'Lard of the Rings'

Other notable 'Thesps' who have indicated an interest in joining the stellar cast include; Gareth Hale of forgettable English comedy duo 'Hale and Pace'. Gareth owns up to being somewhat less of a thespian than the demigod Blessed, but admits to being an enthusiastic amateur, who will, 'Give it my all'.

Another rotund celeb eyeing a place on the stage is svelte comedienne, Jo Brand. Brand claims to have had pots of acting experience, including bit parts in 'Zulu', alongside a young Michael Caine, and a walk on in 'Cheers', when she stood in as Norm Peterson, after regular George Wendt claimed to be somewhat nauseous after a prolonged bout of pretzel snaffling.

Brand admitted to being a little disappointed after claiming she was originally offered the part of 'Galadriel the Royal Elf', only to discover that she would actually be playing 'Shelob' the fat spider.

Others in the pipeline include Christopher Biggins, Dawn French, that fat bloke off 'Pie in the Sky' and 'Top Gear's' Richard Hammond, who, though not fat in the conventional sense of the word, claims to have fat fingers.

Tickets will be on sale, eventually.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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