CBeebies' Mr Tumble in Nightclub Fall

Funny story written by JP Johnston

Sunday, 14 June 2009

image for CBeebies' Mr Tumble in Nightclub Fall
Mr Bumble

London, Yesterday - Mr Tumble, Lynchpin of BBC's younger children's channel Cbeebies, is comfortable in the Bethlehem Hospital, London, after plunging twenty feet from a nightclub balcony last night.

Mr Tumble is reported by friend and colleague Miss Hoolie to have been "completely hammered."

"He took the fall while he was dancing with his shirt off to I Will Survive on the banister," said the dizzy nursery nurse.

A spokesman for the hospital said Tumble suffered a broken collarbone and wrist, and concussion. "He will not be able to sign any words for several weeks, although there is likely to be no permanent injury."

Concerns that performers are showing a bad example to the under-7 age group have been raised in the BBC recently over reports of other wild nights out and alcohol- and drug-fuelled parties involving Cbeebies personalities.

The Twirlywoos were recently charged with possessing cocaine in a pub toilet, although charges were dropped due to there being no evidence left. Other personalities - who could not be named due to pending court appearances - were arrested last November for gross public indecency. Cbeebies made no comment except "Eh-Oh."

Upsy Daisy, carefree spirit of In The Night Garden, is spending her fifth week in the Priory for stress and alcohol abuse.

There has, of course been misbehaviour throughout the history of children's television.

Matthew Corbett of The Sooty Show used his well-known hand puppets to make obscene images with under-16s, Mr Roy from the 1970's Basil Brush killed two police officers before being shot by marksmen in a drug-fuelled meltdown at his Solihull mansion, and the cast of Thames TV's flagship kids' show Rainbow were famously convicted of terrorist acts and membership of the Red Army Faction.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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