Written by Greg Creedy

Wednesday, 13 May 2009

Generously fleshed Maltese singer Chiara Siracusa is ready to do battle with the rest of Europe with her soporific ballad What If We.

The 32 year old Eurovision veteran will make her third attempt to bag as many douze points as possible at this year's Eurovision Song Contest.

In 1998, Chiara failed to hit the Eurovision top spot, being pipped by Israeli man/woman crossbreed Dana International and long lost English singer Imaani Saleem.

Chiara tried again in 2005 and this time managed to reach the top runner-up position.

This year she's determined to win the competition that's the surest route to obscurity, despite
rivalry from female singers thin enough to be her MRI scan cross-section.

Said Chiara with a chuckle: "As you can see, I'm no Kate Moss. I like to have a good breakfast. But this competition isn't about looks. It's about talent."

So what will the Malteser breakfast on that special day? The lady won't say, but sources have it that the Cheeky Girls have been flown in together with an extra long baguette. Tasty.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Eurovision, malta




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