Saw III causes 19 people to vomit in cinemas; 3 people die from choking on vomit

Funny story written by KendoMonkey

Wednesday, 1 November 2006

image for Saw III causes 19 people to vomit in cinemas; 3 people die from choking on vomit
Saw 3 - shadowy

In its opening weekend, horror film Saw III has caused multiple cinema incidents. In at least 12 cinemas across the UK and US, the third film in the Saw franchise has been implicated in at least 19 vomit related incidents, along with 3 apparent cases of deaths caused by "choking on vomit". Mark Bolawn, manager for one of Odean cinemas, declared:

"Our cinema was one of those involved in the incidents. It appears that during our midnight screening, a few people vomited due to scenes of grisly violence. One of those people was kissing his sweetheart at the time and apparently vomited into her lungs. She didn't make it. One usher told me that she was wearing a Spinal Tap t-shirt.

"As a concession to the incident, we are refunding the young man's ticket price and offering him a bag of Sunkist popcorn."

The vomiting has apparently been quite widespread - literally - across the UK and the US where is has received mix-reviews from filmgoers.

"I thought it was quite tame and boring," said Sarah, 12, who watched the film with the rest of her classmates. "Justin Timberlake was in it and he did this weird dance thing like he was a robot. I liked that bit. But I've seen all the gore before, it was silly and looked like it was filmed in a tomato ketchup factory."

Saw III is available in all cinemas now.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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