Jim Davidson Nicked

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 11 January 2013

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image for Jim Davidson Nicked
Davidson being led away to be exonerated

Washed-up comedian Jim Davidson has been arrested by police in London after complaints from members of the public that he is shit.

Davidson, 59, is the one-time 'funnyman' who coined the jocular phrase "Nick, Nick", and built his whole act upon it.

His stand-up repertoire includes 'jokes' about those from ethnic minorities, homosexuals and disabled people.

In March 2004, Davidson publicly left the United Kingdom for the tax-free haven of Dubai in protest at the Labour Party government. At the time, he declared that:

"I may as well go to Dubai and be an ethnic minority there than wait five years till I become one here." (Wikipedia)

Davidson was arrested by police at Heathrow Airport last week. Arresting officer Sergeant Derek Plod told the so-called comedian:

"Nick, nick."

But Davidson told reporters that he was "a gentleman", and would be "totally exonerated".

That's what I would say in his position, wouldn't you?

Davidson added:

"I've never forced myself on a girl in my life"

declining to comment on whether or not he'd ever forced himself on any other genders.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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