Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 12 December 2012

SHERMAN OAKS, California - Charlie Sheen is overjoyed that he has once again hit paydirt with his new television show Anger Management.

Sheen, who was fired from the hit sit-com Two and A Half Men, which was paying him $1.8 million per week, recently sat down and spoke with Pico de Gallo of the national news entertainment program Tittle Tattle Tonight.

Charlie expressed the fact that he knows he messed up big time when he let the Fort Knox show slip through his egotistical hands.

He stated that he loves his new show since he is in every single scene. He also added that he still drinks like a fish except not on camera.

The 47-year-old actor told de Gallo that on his new show, he is the boss and he gets to dictate to everyone what he wants done and how he wants it done.

The former Space Cadet, a nickname he shares with Gary Busey, stated that he especially likes putting the good looking female guest stars in skimpy bikini swimsuits, baby doll gowns, and dainty teddies.

Sheen was told that reports had stated that he had been seen with Tiger Woods ex-wife the stunningly sexy Elin Nordegren, 32, parked out by the famed Hollywood sign and it sure appeared they were involved in some first class cuddling.

Carlitos, as Eva Longoria calls him, turned a little pink in the face and replied that yes the reports were as true as Britney Spears' C-Section scar.

He went on to say that he had run into Elin at a Giggling Guacamole Restaurant in La Brea and the two hit it off like chips and queso.

When asked if he would like to get into a relationship with Ms. Nordegren Charlie smacked his lips, raised his eyebrows and asked "Is the North Pole cold? Does it rain in Seattle? and Is Kirstie Alley overweight as the darn dickens?"

"Yes, yes, and yes" replied Pico de Gallo.

SIDENOTE: The Swedish-born Elin Nordegren, who is reportedly worth $100 million, recently confessed to Piers Morgan that two American men who she thinks hung the moon are Ryan Seacrest and Charlie Sheen.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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