"Random Story" button causes rapid-fire computer trading, shutting down U.S. stock market

Funny story written by SpaceElevator

Friday, 22 October 2010

image for "Random Story" button causes rapid-fire computer trading, shutting down U.S. stock market
I get told "...but you don't look like a Duncan Niederauer..." by a lot of people

(New York, NY) - "Market crashed again. Damn! Thought we had things fixed, but apparently not." These words were immediately tweeted by Duncan Niederauer (NYSE Euronext CEO) following Friday's abrupt system shutdown.

Although "circuit breakers" that were installed after the May 6, 2010 flash crash of the U.S. stock market worked successfully, one expert says the results may have been much worse if the glitch had happened a mere ten minutes later.

"After 2:30 pm there is no safety mechanism to stop trading if the DJIA loses between 1050 and 2100 points," said concerned U.S. Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner. "To give you an idea, that's between ten and twenty percent of the market."


- At 2:22 pm the Dow Jones Industrial Average sharply declined by 1050 points, triggering a 30-minute halt in trading.

- This pause allowed investigators to eventually trace the root cause of the problem to faulty wiring that was attached to the » Random Story « button located at headquarters.

- At 2:46 pm CEO Mark Lowton was notified of the incident. "I have been meaning to get that thing fixed," said Lowton.

(Note: In the interest of time, none of the facts in this article have been verified by the author.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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