'Finger of Fudge' candy launch bombs in Texas

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

image for 'Finger of Fudge' candy launch bombs in Texas
The promo campaign featured some highly questionable imagery

Dallas, Texarse - (Chocablock): Tasteless and culturally insensitive crap is just one description of the $10 million roll-out of UK best-loved Finger of Fudge candy bar.

Texan shoppers recoiled with horror at the 80c chocolate, a traditional tuckbox staple for generations of British schoolboys.

The iconic A Finger of Fudge is just enough to give your kids a treat promo jingle was also branded deeply offensive and referred to social workers under draconian Texan state child protection laws.

"Folks down these parts just ain't fooled by no limey fudgery," Dallas candystore worker Dave Redneck said today.

Merchandising blurbs describe the chocolate-coated confectionery 'as smooth on the top with a rough, grainy regular texture on the bottom.'

"It's that 'Full of sticky fudge goodness and very small and neat' line folks find upsettin," Redneck added.

"Could give the underaged some very ungodly ideas."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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