Luxembourg Admits Nuclear Bomb Deal
Red-faced politicians in Luxembourg have admitted making an approach to North Korea in a bid to buy nuclear technology.
Read full story"Gravity is a myth, the world sucks" monograph wins Nobel astrophysics prize
Stockholm, Sweden - (Associated Mess): This year's Nobel astrophysics prize has been awarded to Creationist scientists from Kansas, Missouri whose contention of the non-existence of gravity as an empirical force to be reckoned with has earned th...
Read full storyBrits' grave-robbing testimony in wiccan vets' burials appeal
Washington DC - (Associated Mess): Pentagon lawyers opposing a Supreme Court ruling authorising wiccan veterans to use spiritual symbols such as the pentacle on tombstones at military cemetaries have sent in the big guns to testify as expert witness...
Read full storyFelix Leads Protests Against Creation of "Allergy-Free" Cats
New York City -- Furious felines mobbed Grand Central Station last night as Felix the Cat led them in a protest against the creation of so-called "hypoallergenic" cats. The outraged Felix, looking quite spiffy in a new designer plaid vest,...
Read full storyRepublican Voters Jumping Ship as Titanic Sinks
Like the sinking of the Titanic, thousands of traditional Republican voters are "jumping ship."...
Read full story