Piglet Is Dead - Assumed Murdered
Christipher, the local insane boy who believed a family pig from the farm was sentient finally snapped back into reality and butchered the creature who he dubbed Piglet.
Read full storyMichael Jackson Dance-Floored By Flu
SANTA MARIA. Calif. (AP) - Pop superstar Michael Jackson has been rushed to hospital with flu, delaying the jury selection process in his trial on child molestation charges.
Read full storyPresident Bush's Image Revered as Religious Icon
A medical photograph taken with the latest Ham-corder™ technology reveals an imprint of President George W. Bush's face on former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani's prostate. The startling photo (right), stolen from the office of a board-certi...
Read full storyGrammy Awards Score Ratings Bonanza Among Dead Viewers
According to overnight Nielsen ratings, the 47th annual Grammy Awards telecast on Sunday scored the highest share ever among dead people. A resounding 53 percent of all television sets belonging to dead persons were turned on during the show.
Read full storyNothing Beats a Timex
East Otis, Massachusetts, in the foothills of the Berkshire Mountains, is the kind of place that can be seen only from the air. Some wags—especially those who enjoy a little night life, ethnic food, and cable television—have observed that from the air is the only way to see East Otis. There is a reservoir, which everyone calls a lake, in East Otis; and my wife's parents used to have a cottage—...
Read full storyWomen Say Suicide Pact Leader Wasn't the Hunk He Claimed to Be
KLAMATH FALLS, Oregon - Most of the women who had agreed to travel to Gerald Krein's trailer to disrobe, share intimacies with him, and then hang themselves said they changed their minds as soon as they saw his photo on the Web. Krein, 26, had been p...
Read full storyAirline Service "Crashes"
American Airlines announced Thursday that they will no longer offer pillows for passengers on any of their flights. "We can save up to 375,000 dollars a year by dropping the pillows. Blankets, however, will still be available," an airline spokesman...
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