London - Wednesday's state ceremony will feature a remote controlled latex mannequin whose batteries are powered by low-emission biofuel gas. "Who cares if it looks like Abu Hamza in drag, eh?" Prince Philip chuckled as Palace puppeteers finalized...
A well-spoken and well-preserved grandmother, Mrs Elizabeth Windsor, made a speech earlier this week in which she suggested that her colleagues, or, as she prefers to call them, "subjects" should cut back on the excesses of modern living and save for...
London - Fears she'll suddenly snuff it on live UK TV were doing the rounds at Hellfire Club HQ today. The Illuminatis' cold war shoo-in has been plagued by nightmares since Sunday's tragic 1,000 Guineas that claimed the life of 33/1 filly Gray Pe...
London - (News of the Screwz): Tuesday's glorious Glib Dem/Con freakshow is on the skids. Sordid money-grubbing revelations about Sarah, Duchess of Yuck pimping for Prince Andrew have sent HM's blood pressure rocketing. A fresh installment thre...
London - (Rioters): The dog poo-smeared royal document was dumped inside a Thameslink Gents this evening. An accompanying official envelope had We Are Not Amused scrawled in blood. A sneak preview of the contents shows a mixed bag of Old Tory...
London - (Rotten Fruit): An emergency coup d'etat will see the cancellation of the Queen's Peach on Wednesday. The prediction comes from self-confessed shagger of 'no more than 30 women' cum-Lib/Dem mouthpiece Nick C Legg-Over, 69. "All the sig...
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