WASHINGTON (AP) President George W. Bush was taken to Walter Reed Army Medical Center today just after his staff finished the morning news briefing. The president was listening to Karl Rove read the main headlines in USA Today - the only paper Mr. Bu...
Washington, DC--Building upon his belief that Americans need to assume more responsibility for all aspects of their health, financial security, and overall well-being, as well as reminiscing with nostalgia about his youthful comment that poor people...
TORONTO, CANADA - As the lockout of National Hockey League (NHL) players reached its 117th day (January 10), the Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA) blamed out-of-work hockey players for a disturbing spike in cabin fever-related incidents. Acco...
Well, the elections are over and I've been thinking: 51% of the voting public must be onto something that I've been missing. All this time I'm thinking that illegal and unnecessary wars, negative job growth, tens of millions without health insurance...
As his health suffered a further setback today, Yasser Arafat announced whom he wishes to take over his role in the event of his demise.
Republican House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, rebuked by a House Ethics Committee at the end of September for pressuring a fellow member of the House of Representatives to switch his vote on a health care bill, may soon face more serious charges if the...
Washington, DC, and Crawford, TX--President Bush today confirmed that if re-elected, he will offer government-sponsored health care coverage to all other nations who do not currently have national health insurance for their citizens, but his Administ...
Health Secretary Dr John Reid is to introduce a bill in parliament making it compulsory for less attractive women to attend their local pub every evening. The bill is in response to pub landlords who believe that far more product is consumed when men...
Washington, DC--President George W. Bush today outlined his proposal to give vouchers to middle-class Americans seeking jobs, job security, affordable health care, and the promise of an eventual retirement that does not include sleeping on the street...
British health officials say that they are unmoved by the bruhaha in the media and among interest groups regarding the new 5-in-1 jab. A spokesman says that like the 3-in-1 they will look to experts abroad rather than hysterical doctors.
I always figured that someone with a healthy life, a good set of friends, or a stable family wouldn’t be able to become an artist. My theory was based on Van Gough’s ear, Picasso’s blueness, and Frida Kahlo’s broken back. Health, family, AND friendships all had to be faltering in order for your artistry to materialize. It was clear to me that if I ever wanted to accomplish being an artist I had to...
Washington, DC - Public health experts and beltway spin doctors are trying to understand and explain why the gonorrhea rate among the nation's legislators, their staff and aides is over twelve-times the rate for the general population.
Bethesda, MD - Earlier this month, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was given a clean bill of health by Dr. Jeremy North at the Bethesda Medical Center following a prostrate cancer scare. However, all is not well in Mr. Rumsfeld's nether regions...
WASHINGTON - Alan Greenspan, chairman of the Federal Reserve, announced today he would take certain key steps to ensure the continued recovery and health of the economy. "Flimmity-flammity, bimmity-bammity," he told reporters, "dreezl...
Speaking at the Fourth Ministerial Conference of Environment and Health in Budapest today a spokesperson for the World Health Organisation (WHO) expressed its concern for the state of health-care in Switzerland.
An angel (pictured) has been found working in a medical clinic in Houndsworth, England. Staff at the centre became suspicious when their patients' health suddenly began to improve drastically, and when the angel, who had been using the name Thomas Mc...
World Health Organisation officials have today put the world on full Red Alert as a new strain of virus sweeps the globe.
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!