After 48 years of misery, upsets, lousy performances and overpaid Rooney, England have just finished first in the World Cup! The news has just seeped through after a donkey ridden by a Himalayan Sherpa, his five children and wife rode into Kathman...
Nobody knows who should play in the England team better than millions of unqualified (sometimes drunk) coaches up and down the country. The world cup and the England team unites the country in a way only declaring war on the Germans used to. Back and...
Ratings barely made it past 1.0 yesterday evening during BBC One's opening episode of Masterchef Brazil, which was routinely panned by both critics and viewers. The first task set for the six contestants was to create a starter and main course for...
Pop? Pop? I ask you, bloody cheeky little twerps...that's what our two teenage prodigies took to calling me. Raheem and Luke, they've hardly got a hair on their collective testicles and they had the nerve to call me "Pop". In fact knowing kids thes...
Paper bag supermodel Carlos Tevez is missing the World Cup Finals, not because Argentina Coach Alejandro Sabella didn't choose him, but because he has decided to quit football and return to his first love of acting. Carlos Tevez, best known in the...
The government has revealed today that Adrian Chiles is actually Wayne Rooney from the year 2033! Adrian Chiles has been the awkward face of the ITV football coverage team for an eternity plus seven, with no clear justification ever being issued b...
Arsenal may have to replay their narrow FA Cup win after an investigation into the game found the pink ball used was stupid. It stopped short of concluding the entire football industry was corrupt, tiresome and overpriced as that would have been too...
Millions of English football fans are predicted to be brutally attacked in a sexual manner this summer by an elderly owl in a poor physical condition and its players, but the Police Force have already stated that they will not investigate a single fo...
Yesssssssssss! I'm on my way to Brazil, wohoooo! Good old Roy, he knows a quality player when he sees one, which isn't very often in my case having been on the bench due to my managerial faux pas this season. Now I suppose you'll want to know how...
The World Cup is coming! And everyone in Algérie is excited on tenterhooks! The World Cup is played every four years and it is in a different country every time. This year it is in Brazil which is the best team and they will win - but not if the A...
Sammy Caruthers of Guildford announced yesterday his own provisional 23 man England football squad for the World Cup 2014 in Brazil this June. Sammy, who goes to school at St Margarets Church of England primary, said that changes could be made l...
Costa do Sauipe, BRAZIL: FIFA 2014 WORLD CUP DRAW: Sir Geoff Hurst drew England into Group D, D, D, D, D, D, D, D, D, D, DEATH!! and officially Greg Dyke, Chairman of the FA, responded by drawing a finger across his throat, to signify Group D, D, D,...
Italy, Uruguay and Costa Rica. Bloody hell. I'm sure that Sepp hates England. Ever since Panorama did a good job of filleting him and FIFA with all those corrupt banana republic bastards he's had it in for us. I can't see us getting a result wi...
It is time to take the opportunity to take you folks in England (and you in Scotland and Ireland too for that matter) to task on this thing you call 'European Football' God only knows somebody needs to, so I'll take this heavy responsibility on my shoulders. The main gripe I have is this silliness that you dare to call football (you undoubtedly stole this name from our proud game). What a load...
The final day of Wimbledon - traditionally the day of the mens final - was thrown into controversy early this morning when Andy Murray was refused entry by strict security staff. Murray - the first British mens finalist for 74 years - was turned a...
Sports Minister, George Sad, unveiled Britain's bid to host the 2020 Tiddlywinks World Cup in his monthly press conference yesterday. Early estimates suggested that hosting the popular event will cost around £300 million. Mr Sad dismissed that...
Beer and sex must be sold at all venues hosting matches in the 2014 World Cup in Brazil, football's world governing body, Fifa, has insisted. Fifa General Secretary Jerome Valcke said the right to sell beer and sex must be enshrined in a World Cup...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.
