Barney Frank isn't just the Representative from the great state of Massachusetts, he's now the most influential power bottom in America, according to Lavender magazine-a publication dedicated to serving the mighty homosexual. Lav (as it's known) l...
The Herschel Telescope has discovered what appears to be a giant eyeball peering through the hole in space. The discovery was made around 9:52 EST and has the scientific community baffled. "From our estimates, we believe the eyeball to be aroun...
Great news for travelers who enjoy flying. The FAA announced Wednesday that crying babies or children that appear irritable will no longer be allowed to board domestic flights. "We have counseled with Homeland Security and in an effort to accommo...
Russell "Buddy" Jenkins hoisted himself out of his lawn chair to dig for another beer but all he found was some partially melted ice and a few empties. "I knew we were drinkin at a good pace, but I was shocked to find out that we finished off a 30...
Reader's Digest came out with their top 10 party fouls list and it is no surprise that backing up a toilet at a party is at the top of that list. This event is troubling enough at your own house, but when it happens during a party at a friends house, it is nearly impossible to redeem yourself. Some experts call this, "The Ultimate Party Foul." No host wants to be interrupted with this situation...
In these trying times, residents of Honolulu, Hawaii are doing everything they can to attract more tourists-including changing the town's name. "As a Japanese tourist, I find it difficult to say Honolulu and I am so happy about the name change. N...
International Monetary Fund Managing Director, Dominique Strauss-Kahn has presented the world with a massive "Do Over" suggestion. "It's fairly obvious that the current global economic situation sucks right now. We propose a plan that will elimin...
We've all been in a crowded pack of people and suddenly fallen victim to a mystery fart crop duster. One minute you're talking to your friend and the next, you're gasping for air and playing detective. Was it the fat guy in front of you or the suspicious senior citizen on your right? Kip Givens, Fart Crop Dusting Spokesperson hopes to discourage this type of behavior by creating awareness about...
Before Carlos Boozer leaves the locker room, he walks in front of the mirror and says, "I am a special, kind, talented person and mean words can't hurt me anymore. I am a somebody." This has been a ritual for Boozer over the past three seasons as...
Damn you Mayan calendar! In case you haven't heard, the year 2012 has been predicted to be a game changing year for our planet. The Mayan calendar does not go past the year 2012, leading plenty of logical people to believe that the end of civilization is right around the corner. Although there will be some vindication for crazy folk who rant all day about the apocalypse, the vast majority of hu...
Jupiter, FL - Hidden amongst the golf courses, pharmacies and bingo rooms lies a community of seniors who are hungry for more than just a reasonably priced early bird special. A startling number of seniors are on the prowl for hardcore dog fighting r...
Evansville, IN - Greg Diamond, 35, was brutally assaulted yesterday afternoon by employees at a CJ Dolllar's after being positively identified as a mystery shopper. Diamond works for Ghost Customers, a Denver based company whose mystery shoppers c...
NEW ORLEANS - 2012 Republican presidential hopefuls Newt Gingrich and Sarah Palin have altered their "Drill Here, Drill Now" slogan to the more relevant "Burn Here, Burn Now" in an attempt to capitalize on the media attention directed at the Louisian...
A university research group recently found that even mice have the ability to snub their tiny noses. The research shows that although the rats fed the organic diet were not actually healthier than the non-organic fed rats, they were much more annoyin...
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