WASHINGTON, D.C.--In the aftermath of Mitt Romney's comment Tuesday that he poured over "binders full of women" for cabinet appointees while governor of Massachusetts, Vice President Biden took the time to inform reporters gathered at the Rose Ga...
PORTLAND, Maine (ABSNN) - An earthquake that registered 4.0 struck just west of Portland just before 8 p.m. this evening. The Illuminati has taken responsibility for the temblor and "vows to cause an even greater quake should Mitt Romney fail to be...
In the first of three presidential debates, Romney explicitly said that he supports cutting funding for PBS and Sesame Street. Fans of public television were particularly angered that he singled out Big Bird. "I'm a huge fan of Big Bird," said Romney...
DENVER - Well the first presidential debate of 2012 is now in the history books and it proved to be as exciting as listening to Ann "Trigger Face" Coulter talk about beauty tips. Sinclair Petaluma with Political Salad Bar Magazine stated that both...
DENVER - The first Presidential Debate between President Obama and non-president Mitt Romney will be held in The Mile High City. The debate will be moderated by Jim Lehrer, a man who should have changed his last name a long, long time ago. Lehr...
WINNEMUCCA, Nevada - Mitt Romney was in Winnemucca, the town that the Paiute Indians named and which means place where bison frolick with wild stallions and look silly as the dickens. "Old Mittens" confided to his GOP campaign spokesperson Cooter...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama has decided to sit out the upcoming presidential debates in lieu of an even bigger crowd-pleaser. Mitt will suit up the mitts to spar against--HIMSELF. Video spots will be aired showing the Republican candidate s...
BILLINGSGATE POST - ELECTION SPECIAL - In a face saving development that could potentially change the way voters look at presidential candidates, the handlers of Barack Obama requested that his head be put into a hermetically sealed bubble so that Mi...
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