Jokes

All jokes submitted by Jo Dash.

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Chinese Paralympic team

China has today announced its dream team for the approaching Paralympics, including medal favourites Fu Kin Mong, Sim Pal Twat, Wan Lim Gon, Fut Long Tung, won kee eye and Mai Lef Fut....

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Jesus

I saw a sign outside church that read, Jesus saves....

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ginger kid

Ive just de-flowered a virgin....

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double entendre

Just saw that advert where an athlete in a wheelchair says, My arms are stronger than your legs!...

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dwarf

Ive just been told off for taking the piss out of a retarted dwarf..apparently its neither big nor clever...

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santa the perv

little girl goes to see Santa.......

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Parents advice

My parents always told me to say NO to strangers........ It was sound advice until that day in the park some pervert asked me if I wouldnt mind if he raped me.......

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Bloke joke

I hate women who have too much make up on....

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One to ponder

Teresa Lewis has become the first woman in America to be executed in the last 5 years. Apparently she could have been spared execution if she had an IQ level below 70. Hers was 72....

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lesbian vag

A gynaecologist examines a lesbian and remarked Madam that is the cleanest vagina I have ever seen...

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The lazy spanish

Theres a General Strike in Spain today. And the question everybody wants to know is........

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Humpty Dumpty and the BJ

Humpty Dumpty sat on his bed...

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Chavs

What have yeast and chavs got in common?...

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Tourettes

I parked in a disabled space today and a traffic warden shouted to me......

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Really young horny.....

Really young horny girls who will do anything for the price of a pint of beer....

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A gypsy woman.....

A Gypsy woman came up to me in the street and said, Lucky Heather....

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Liverpool

I was sat on the toilet when I heard a voice saying Liverpool are going to win the league. I stood up, turned round and realised one of my turds had said it....

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