A camel and a turd walk into a bar and order a round of drinks. Ah a camel and a turd! the local drunk announces. Next, famous Turkish President, Kemmal Attaturk,...
(Or: A Room of Her Own) It’s Mother’ Day again this year And those whom we all hold so dear Are trapped inside with family near (Too near, I’m guessing, for those...
I went to my local garden centre yesterday morning. A quite attractive young man approached me as I wandered through the Herbaceous Borders looking for a Hardy Laurel....
A bloke goes into a chemists... Excuse me, says the man. Have you got any half millimeter condoms? That would only fit a mouse, says the chemist. I know, replies the man....
Two old girls are watching a film in the local cinema. One of them turns to her mate and whispers: Maude, that man sitting next to me, is having a wank. The dirty bastard,...
I was working with my mate, laying a wooden floor. He got a bit edgy, so I asked what was wrong. Dont like wooden floors, son, he said. Why? I enquired It nearly done my brother...
(With apologies to Joyce Kilmer) I think that I shall never see Someone as dumb as Donald T. Someone whose angry mouth is prest Against the mic in his slugfests. Someone who looks...
The United Nations History Research Unit has conducted extensive studies into the COVID-19 pandemic. A team of reknowned scientists, economists and other experts released...
Life has changed a lot with the coronavirus. Things will never be the same. In fact, I would say this is far bigger than 9/11. Much bigger....
A man orders a steak dinner at a restaurant, and when the waiter arrives with his dinner, the customer notices that the waiters thumb is on top...
Why wont white sharks eat impeachment defense lawyers when they go swimming? A: They are the same skin color. B: They are both in the same profession....
Ken Starr argued yesterday that we are making the process of impeachment too partisan, too easy. Isn’t this the man who tried to impeach a president...
The Western Skink Lizard is an amazing reptile. When confronted with a predator, it can detach its brightly-colored tail and, since its tail is full of nerves, the tail will squiggle for a few seconds...
Greenback was the name given by the Park Ranger to a big brown moose. One day, Greenback decided to migrate to the far side of the the forest, trotting towards the road that snaked through the sanctuary....
Do you think after this fiasco Republicans will attempt to amend the Constitution? Here’s my proposal for their 28th Amendment to the Constitution: “Bribery, but only in pursuit of advancing a candidates political...
I love red, I love blue, But most of all... I love chartreuse. Directions: ------------------ Repeat 10 times to self in mirror on bad hair days. Stick pins into ….oh.... just anything, really, with a sense of hope...
These seem to be the three or four main excuses Republicans give for not impeaching Donald Trump. “Yeah, he tried to enlist, through bribery, the help of a foreign government to win an election, but what the fuck? Who...
A bartender notices a drunken customer at the end of the bar has finished his latest pint. He strolls over to him and asks, I see your glass is empty. Do you want another? The drunk sneers at him, and snaps, Are you an...
I really love yoga. Been doing it for years. It makes you flexible and is great for the body and mind. But sometimes it can be hard on the nose....
They made the president show the last twenty years of his tax returns. The leader of the free world replied, What tax returns? Buy one joke, get...
A copyright-free joke for any candidate who would like to use it on the stump to zing the current American president. (With a little tweaking, it may apply to many other world leaders, not to mention...
A father and mother with teenage kids enter a motel in a rather seedy part of town. We were trying to find a Holiday Inn or a Red Roof Inn or something but everything is already booked up. I hope your...
I have compiled a list of names that I have created for reality TV shows that are more to the point. In other words, lets call them what they really are. For you non-Americans, I have no intention of...
Heres the joke, its a one liner but i gotta make it 50 words, so Im sorry if we havent gotten to the joke yet. Okay here it is,...
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