Discussion Forum

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

Chester? Joy Renee? Are you back? Have you returned? Are you still looking to marry a prince?

We do have some royalty on here:

Fergus McCarthy is also known as Arch Bishop McCarthy. He is the personal confessor to the King of Ireland and is some minor member of the royal family (cousin or something).

A writer who calls himself San Francisco Onion is the Queen of California.

Hydrogen Balloon is actually Don Juan Julio Antonio Varga De La Vega Gonzalez Gonzalez, the crown Prince of El Salvador (that isn't Europe, but it is still royalty).

Welcome back. I hope to see many more wonderful spoofs and stories from you.

A few old timers are still here: Queen Mudder, NickFun, and I are still around from the old days.

I'm only an earl. Will that do?

Old days. Yep, the really olden ones when Helium was on the throne and Joy Renee was trawling the Monegasque principality looking for a hot ass.

But royalty? You wanna get paid royalties for your stories?

Nah, only me, J-Man, Bucky, NickFun and one or two others ever get a dime for their stuff.

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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Let me introduce myself....I am deposed Count Bargis Tryhol from Hungary.

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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What kind of question is this?

"Is there any hot royal spoof writers" You mean, "Are there...?", right?

Anyway, Joy Renee, I answered your email because Jman got in touch with me privately to notify me of your return. He's told me all about you, and how you live in a rundown trailer somewhere after having been beaten and sexually abused by your family or whatever, and he asked me to, well, 'look after you', in a manner of speaking.

Please send me an email by way of the internal email system showing pictures of yourslef that I can scrutinise. Make them large enough - I don't want to be squinting, do I?

By the way, your writing is really good. Well, it's not bad.

Actually, dear, it is bad, in fact, the worst writing I've ever come across. Everyone else thinks so too. It's a shame you weren't here for the Jakki Waterson thread a couple of weeks ago - you could have taken the advice I gave her.

What happened to Adam Clicks thread from earlier today where myself and Monkey Woods were called sub human, or something like that?

Did somebody say something bad and get it deleted?


I dunno. Some people!

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Quote: Monkey Woods

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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What kind of question is this?

"Is there any hot royal spoof writers" You mean, "Are there...?", right?

Anyway, Joy Renee, I answered your email because Jman got in touch with me privately to notify me of your return. He's told me all about you, and how you live in a rundown trailer somewhere after having been beaten and sexually abused by your family or whatever, and he asked me to, well, 'look after you', in a manner of speaking.

Please send me an email by way of the internal email system showing pictures of yourslef that I can scrutinise. Make them large enough - I don't want to be squinting, do I?

By the way, your writing is really good. Well, it's not bad.

Actually, dear, it is bad, in fact, the worst writing I've ever come across. Everyone else thinks so too. It's a shame you weren't here for the Jakki Waterson thread a couple of weeks ago - you could have taken the advice I gave her.

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Pedant.

I've finally decided to break my silence regarding our 'little arrangement' and announce to the whole wide world that you're really Simon Cowbell off the X Factor.

You gave the game away when you admitted you hated Monkeys when the guy showed up for an audition wearing a blue gorilla suit.

Dead giveaway.

Don't blame me for this, you brought it upon yourslef(sic)

It's over Mister Meaner.

And it's your own flute.

You're Simon Cowell in disguise.

There, it's out. Notice, I could have used a semi-colon there, but didn't. That's because semi-colons are subjective and not bound by linguistic laws in the same manner as full colons.

As are the rules regarding parentheses - which tend to be pretty flexible these days, sorta like chewing gum - use em when ya need em. As are hyphens - as long as they maintain the flow of the text you're presenting then you can use them however you choose.

Block lettering is just a cheap shot. When a writer needs to emphasise a particular point, regulation speech should suffice, without necessitating all this computer generated block filled lettering nonsense.
I leave you Mr Monkey Woods with a final thought:

"Is a pedant a pedant because he's a pedant, or just because he's a pedant?"

Ah well,

It's all down to expression and interpretation.

I haven't got a fucking clue what I'm trying to say here Jakki, oops sorry, I meant to say 'Monkey' there, my mistake.

So sorry.

You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people with block lettering and stories about Scunthorpe zoo.

Stop being a twat

Your Mate

(Hands across the different coloured roses)

Skoob

Next move: (critical colon there)

When did I ever say I was your mate?

You didn't.

Anyone for chess?

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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I'm a Madame. I don't know if that's technically royalty, but I do run a VERY successful cathouse a few miles from the Texas/Oklahoma line.

I suppose that makes me the Queen of Madames.

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Quote: Skoob1999

Pedant.

I've finally decided to break my silence regarding our 'little arrangement' and announce to the whole wide world that you're really Simon Cowbell off the X Factor.

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Huh? Little arrangement? Just remind me once more, would you?

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Quote: Skoob1999

You gave the game away when you admitted you hated Monkeys when the guy showed up for an audition wearing a blue gorilla suit.

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Skoob, please supply the link to where I said this.

My memory is shocking these days.

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Quote: Skoob1999

There, it's out. Notice, I could have used a semi-colon there, but didn't. That's because semi-colons are subjective and not bound by linguistic laws in the same manner as full colons.

As are the rules regarding parentheses - which tend to be pretty flexible these days, sorta like chewing gum - use em when ya need em. As are hyphens - as long as they maintain the flow of the text you're presenting then you can use them however you choose.

Block lettering is just a cheap shot. When a writer needs to emphasise a particular point, regulation speech should suffice, without necessitating all this computer generated block filled lettering nonsense.
I leave you Mr Monkey Woods with a final thought:

"Is a pedant a pedant because he's a pedant, or just because he's a pedant?"

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Your extensive notes on grammar usage, and your unending desire to uncover other 'supposed identities' leads me to suspect that you, yourslef, are, in fact, the one and only legendary Shropshire misfit TREVOR IN SEINE. If not, then you are surely related to him. His brother perhaps?

IN SEINE was an avid poster here. Relentless. Never stopped worrying about who was who, and 'is Monkey Woods really Paul Lowton?' and all that kind of trivia. He's been missing from these boards for ... well ... about as long as you have been here, Skoob. It's not impossible, is it? Oh, don't tell me, Skoob. I don't care. It's not worth knowing.

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Quote: Skoob1999

I haven't got a fucking clue what I'm trying to say here Jakki, oops sorry, I meant to say 'Monkey' there, my mistake.

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I thought we had already discussed this, Skoob, in that private message you sent me. Mark told me a long time ago that I couldn't hold conversations in the forum with myslef (or, rather, another one of my identities), so Jakki could not have been me, or Mark would have warned me yet again. I invite you to check with him, and have him confirm this.

I HEREBY GIVE MY PERMISSION FOR MARK LOWTON, THE ADMINISTRATOR OF THESPOOF.COM, TO PROVIDE SKOOB1999, OR ANY OTHER WRITER FROM THE SITE, ALIVE OR DEAD, WITH FULL DETAILS OF MY IDENTITIES ON THIS SITE, SO THAT THE WITTERING STOPS HERE.

Monkey Woods

Pattaya,
Thailand

Your insistence upon reaffirming your suspicions though, even after I have assured you of the contrary, is disturbing - just like it was with IN SEINE. He just wouldn't let it go, even though he was way off the mark - DEMENTED OLD GEEZER that he was/is.

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Quote: Skoob1999

You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people with block lettering and stories about Scunthorpe zoo.

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Splendid.



Good win for you yesterday, Skoob. Pretty much in the balance until the first goal, I'd say.

Yours,

JB

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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Quote: Jaggedone

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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There is absolutely NO WAY that I am fucking any of the Royals! There is something very horsey about them.

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Quote: Earl Grey

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Quote: Jaggedone

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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There is absolutely NO WAY that I am fucking any of the Royals! There is something very horsey about them.

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Good evening Earl, your equestrian fears can all be ended by mounting the rear of a royal bucking bronco!

What was that film called "Break Back Mountain" or "2 Gay cowboys bucking Prince Edward"!!!

I once dreamt that I'd shagged Princess Anne.

It was horrible

Scarred me for life.

EEeuuurggh!

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Skoob1999

I once dreamt that I'd shagged Princess Anne.

It was horrible

Scarred me for life.

EEeuuurggh!

Regards

Skoob.

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A blow job from Annie would be even scarier!

(0-5 glorious Berba! at last!)

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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It is this what happens when you direct his material for English online to the Russian program of translation and soon it alters the process.

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Quote: Adam Click

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Quote: CHESTER

Is there any hot royal spoof writers? This is for all royal countries.

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It is this what happens when you direct his material for English online to the Russian program of translation and soon it alters the process.

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It's called alternative thought processing!

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Quote: Skoob1999

I once dreamt that I'd shagged Princess Anne.

It was horrible

Scarred me for life.

EEeuuurggh!

Regards

Skoob.

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Didn't do much for her either!

A hot royal spoof writer?


Or a royal hot spoof writer?

Prince Charles writes some funny stuff about the weather and all that climate change shit.

But Zara Phillips is yet to write any spoofs.

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Quote: Jaggedone

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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i agree, j.o.!

you know what they say

scum always rises to the top!

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Quote: smurfette

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Quote: Jaggedone

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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i agree, j.o.!

you know what they say

scum always rises to the top!

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Solidarity amongst the Spoof "Pyscho Socialites"! Yeah!

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Quote: Jaggedone

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Quote: smurfette

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Quote: Jaggedone

Fuck the royals, power to the SCUM!

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i agree, j.o.!

you know what they say

scum always rises to the top!

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Solidarity amongst the Spoof "Pyscho Socialites"! Yeah!

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hee hee hee

The thing about royalty (or high ranking noblemen/women) is that they're all inbred to the point of insanity.

Virginia Woolf, who herself was a paragon sanity, said once that Buckingham Palace was the grandest lunatic asylum in England.

Sex with royalty would be like fucking the entire royal family.

I don't know if royalty still inbreed. Now that we know about the problems that go along with it, everyone SHOULD know better.

It doesn't mean they do, though.

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Quote: Madame Bitters

The thing about royalty (or high ranking noblemen/women) is that they're all inbred to the point of insanity.

Virginia Woolf, who herself was a paragon sanity, said once that Buckingham Palace was the grandest lunatic asylum in England.

Sex with royalty would be like fucking the entire royal family.

I don't know if royalty still inbreed. Now that we know about the problems that go along with it, everyone SHOULD know better.

It doesn't mean they do, though.

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Thanks MB for your Rt. Honourable, royal input on this thread for Queens!

As a German ageing rockstar (Udo Lindenberg) once said in his perfect pidgeon English: God Shave The Queen, the rest Johnny Rotten wrote!