Discussion Forum

Re: Tell me more about the cult of Jesus Budda


First of all, what happened to the "h" ??

Are there membership fees? Virgin sacrifices? Do I have to give up everything I own, except maybe a robe and some sandals?

Do I have to go extended periods without eating? Do I have to grow a beard? (Because mine is going a little grey, so maybe somebody could give me a "heads-up," and I'll get some dye or something)

Do I get to sleep with Ally's avatar?

Will I be able to learn yoga and meditation techniques that might finally enable me to silence these voices? Will it help me write spoofs on a par with other members at the site?

Do y'all have a magic starship? 'Cause that could clinch the deal right there.

Or is this whole site a setup, and it's only me and one other guy pretending to be 6,000 other writers?

Just curious.


SFO


BTW - I'm so totally not into the whole mass suicide thing!

Yes, please tell us all about it.

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Quote: Frankie The J

Yes, please tell us all about it.

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FTJ,


You make an excellent point.


SFO

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Quote: The San Francisco Onion

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Quote: Frankie The J

Yes, please tell us all about it.

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FTJ,


You make an excellent point.


SFO

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Indeed he does.


SFO

I was stationed at Hunters Point in 1972. I was fired upon more often there than in SE Asia! I need a new religious philosophy...Jesus Buddism might just be the ticket.

Be careful guys! Remember to practice safe sects.

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Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Be careful guys! Remember to practice safe sects.

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Buck,


Thanks so much for your concern, but I already practiced.

I think I know what I'm doing now.


SFO

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Quote: The San Francisco Onion

Re: Tell me more about the cult of Jesus Budda

Here are your answers:


First of all, what happened to the "h" ?? The guys a Brit. When I asked him about it once before, he said " 'ell if I know!"

Are there membership fees? 'Of course! Just send JB you birthdate, social security number, account numbers, and pin. He'll take care of the membership dues and you've got nothing to worry about.

Virgin sacrifices? You're next

Do I have to give up everything I own'except maybe a robe and some sandals? You can keep all of your kiddie porn and those ladies underclothes you wear at night.

Do I have to go extended periods without eating? Only if you aren' hungry.

Do I have to grow a beard? (Because mine is going a little grey, so maybe somebody could give me a "heads-up," and I'll get some dye or something) What would a cult be without bearded weirdos?

Do I get to sleep with Ally's avatar? Only Duncan Whitehead's wife, dog, and one night stands get to sleep with Ally

Will I be able to learn yoga and meditation techniques that might finally enable me to silence these voices? Listen to the voices! Listen to the voices!

Will it help me write spoofs on a par with other members at the site? Why would you ever want to stoop as low as turd stories?

Do y'all have a magic starship? 'Cause that could clinch the deal right there. Eat the magic mushrooms and you can fly on anything you want.

Or is this whole site a setup, and it's only me and one other guy pretending to be 6,000 other writers? There's about a dozen people here actually working as one writer each, and then DW, Helium, and Skoob do the rest.

Just curious.


SFO


BTW - I'm so totally not into the whole mass suicide thing!

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Since we're sacrificing you Thursday, I don't think that will be a problem.

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Quote: Jalapenoman

Are there membership fees? 'Of course! Just send JB you birthdate, social security number, account numbers, and pin. He'll take care of the membership dues and you've got nothing to worry about.

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J-man,


Thanks I appreciate your help.

He'll find everything he needs here:


http://www.flickr.com/photos/mirandaskye/1154199031/


Toodles!!


SFO

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Quote: The San Francisco Onion
...
Or is this whole site a setup, and it's only me and one other guy pretending to be 6,000 other writers?
...

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This is well documented:
There Are Only Two Spoof Writers
But don't presume you are the 'lone writer'; you could be one of the other writer's multiple personalities. Like me.
All the Best
Roy

Hey Roy!

Welcome back!

Regards

Skoob.

J-Man

I'm stabbing myself in the eye with a fork here.

For the last time: I have only ever wrote on here as Skoob.

I've done over 700 articles in the ten months or so I've been here.

I work a full time job, 12 hour shifts, four days on, four days off. I don't have the time to write under any other name.

I swear on my grandchildren's lives.

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Skoob1999

J-Man

I'm stabbing myself in the eye with a fork here.

For the last time: I have only ever wrote on here as Skoob.

I've done over 700 articles in the ten months or so I've been here.

I work a full time job, 12 hour shifts, four days on, four days off. I don't have the time to write under any other name.

I swear on my grandchildren's lives.

Regards

Skoob.

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Are you sure?


Really sure?

REALLY REALLY SURE?



Ok then, that's fine. I believe you. It's the others you will need to convince. And they are a funny lot.

At least they are most of the time.

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Quote: Skoob1999
Hey Roy!
Welcome back!
Regards
Skoob.

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Thanks Skoob. Not getting much spooftime these days but trying to keep up with what's going on. By the way, is there an easy way of finding all the BT004 stories on Magazine?

All the best
Roy

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Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Hey Roy..Want to do Chapter 11?

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Hi Buck,
Struggling to get the time at the moment, but I'll try to get round to reading the last eight chapters. I may be able to have a go in the next week or so if that's not too late.
Regards
Roy
P.S. I see I have answered your question before you asked it. Maybe I already wrote Chapter 11 but don't know about it yet. Does Mark know that UTC times are not being used for posts?

Lately, theSpoof is all fucked up. Times are wrong, posts are upside in order, the Most Rated section is showing the same stories all by the same writer who hasn't posted a new story is 6 months.
Mark must be on vacation.

Hey Roy..Want to do Chapter 11?

Hey Buck.

Why don't you ask Roy to take chapter 11?

Yap yap yap yap yap yap... and post.

See?

It didn't do it that time.......... Shame really.

Hurry up Roy.

"Has anyone heard from Fergus?"


Do it.

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Quote: Fergus McCarthy
Hurry up Roy.
"Has anyone heard from Fergus?"
Do it.

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OK - will do.

Hey - anyone heard from Fergus lately?

What about now - has anyone heard from Fergus now?

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Quote: Roy Turse

What about now - has anyone heard from Fergus now?

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Not yet Roy.

Welcome back.

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Skoob1999


I work a full time job, 12 hour shifts, four days on, four days off. I don't have the time to write under any other name.

Regards

Skoob.

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Skoob

Is that Spoof writing full time, 12 hour shifts, four days on, four days off?

Astounding discipline!